Whether it's your first Bonnaroo or you’re a music festival veteran, we welcome you to Inforoo.
Here you'll find info about artists, rumors, camping tips, and the infamous Roo Clues. Have a look around then create an account and join in the fun. See you at Bonnaroo!!
firedancer...I know what you mean. People who put so many limitations on things like love are doomed to settle, or will never be completely happy. I'm admittedly very picky, but I don't have a type. It's also why I hate labels(bf, gf, gay, straight, etc). I just think you love who you love, and as long as you're honest with yourself things will be groovy.
i wish u had the crunchy option so i didnt have to make this post.... but def agree with this 100%
???Okay ladies...sorry for my rant. It's just that I have this friend who is as round as she is tall...not that I have a problem with that...but slightly less than perfect. Anyways she had a list a mile long...at least 50 "qualifications" for a potential mate. She was very picky when it came to finding someone...yet got upset when guys rejected her for the same reasons. I tried hooking her up with several guys, but she found fault with all of them b/c of their looks....seriously??!!!! Just always pisses me off. sorry, i still love you all!!! <3
Ah I just had this problem with a friend. He's one of my very good guy friends has a list a mile long of what he wants in a girl. So I hook him up with one of my friends who meet all his criteria we go out...(bunch of unnecessary details)...then he tells me "well she just wasnt hot enough for me." While yes she wasnt a model but he's far from it. I understand there has to be some sort of physical attraction there, but come on when you set your standards so high, they become unrealistic.
???Okay ladies...sorry for my rant. It's just that I have this friend who is as round as she is tall...not that I have a problem with that...but slightly less than perfect. Anyways she had a list a mile long...at least 50 "qualifications" for a potential mate. She was very picky when it came to finding someone...yet got upset when guys rejected her for the same reasons. I tried hooking her up with several guys, but she found fault with all of them b/c of their looks....seriously??!!!! Just always pisses me off. sorry, i still love you all!!! <3
Ah I just had this problem with a friend. He's one of my very good guy friends has a list a mile long of what he wants in a girl. So I hook him up with one of my friends who meet all his criteria we go out...(bunch of unnecessary details)...then he tells me "well she just wasnt hot enough for me." While yes she wasnt a model but he's far from it. I understand there has to be some sort of physical attraction there, but come on when you set your standards so high, they become unrealistic.
i think everyone has that overly picky friend... but then everyone has that friend that has zero standards too...im sure ive probably fallen into both categories from time to time... im kinda drunk and dont remember where i was going with this.. so im going to stop typing and post it anyway.. haha goodnight!
I knew you'd be back to this thread soon! I've missed you and dammit, come hell or high water, we are meeting this year! I mean that in the nicest, kindest way possible.
I'm pretty sure I said I was going to pounce you after NIN last year... you were suspiciously absent for said pouncing...
I agree. While i have stuff i look for in someone, love can easily bypass any rules i usually try to set. if i find someone who matches what i say i want perfectly, i usually run screaming, cause i know it definitely is not about love. Love just happens, it isnt forced because somebody looks good. it can make a person look so much better all by itself.
Ah I just had this problem with a friend. He's one of my very good guy friends has a list a mile long of what he wants in a girl. So I hook him up with one of my friends who meet all his criteria we go out...(bunch of unnecessary details)...then he tells me "well she just wasnt hot enough for me." While yes she wasnt a model but he's far from it. I understand there has to be some sort of physical attraction there, but come on when you set your standards so high, they become unrealistic.
i think everyone has that overly picky friend... but then everyone has that friend that has zero standards too...im sure ive probably fallen into both categories from time to time... im kinda drunk and dont remember where i was going with this.. so im going to stop typing and post it anyway.. haha goodnight!
Im sure whereever you were going it was gonna be good...revisit it again tomorrow it will come back to you
Carp you are totally right!!! I also have another co-worker"work friend" who's husband never works, is a crack head & a physical and mental abuser to her and is bouncing from jail to jail. He has held a gun to her head 3 times....locked her in a closet...striped her naked so she won't run away, etc. and no matter what I do she stays... so to clarify i do not think that this "settling"is a good thing
I agree. While i have stuff i look for in someone, love can easily bypass any rules i usually try to set. if i find someone who matches what i say i want perfectly, i usually run screaming, cause i know it definitely is not about love. Love just happens, it isnt forced because somebody looks good. it can make a person look so much better all by itself.
Post by forrestsjennie on Jan 10, 2010 2:46:59 GMT -5
My 2 qualifications for a guy? Chemistry, and Attraction.
I think that should be all that matters, by setting a checklist for your life, you're setting yourself up for failure. Because really, when does life EVER go as planned? I've been attracted to all kinds of men, and they all bring something different to the table..
I also don't think anyone should set limitations, or expectations for a relationship. Such as a timeline, by date 5 we should be here in the relationship, and we can only be exclusive/nonexclusive for this long before reevaluating, blahblahblah...just go with the flow and see what happens, there's a surprise around every corner, so never walk a straight line
I'm working on 2 days of no sleep, so I don't know if any of this made sense, but I'll come back another time to evaluate how sane I am later..
I knew you'd be back to this thread soon! I've missed you and dammit, come hell or high water, we are meeting this year! I mean that in the nicest, kindest way possible.
I'm pretty sure I said I was going to pounce you after NIN last year... you were suspiciously absent for said pouncing...
I know I know, I suck...
I told you before I just quit checking my emails and this board for about 2 weeks before roo.. no real reason, just kinda happened that way.. i planned on going to the brunch though, so i wasnt really worried about it... figured id meet most everyone from here at that time...
buuuut then i slept right through that!
im pretty sure ive sent you my number since then, if not pm me or something
sooooo this year there should be no problems with pouncing!!
I told him I was too old for him, but would see him around.
Dani, the guy I've been "seeing" is five years younger than me (I say seeing loosely because I have no idea what our status is). He graduated high school the same year I graduated college! I didn't think it would, but it works.
So I definitely wouldn't count out a guy, and a cute one at that, just because of his age!
As a 20 year old that's the best thing i've heard all day.
-When I Hear My Name -Dead Leaves and the Dirty Ground -Blue Orchid -Passive Manipulation -Red Rain -Death Letter -My Doorbell -Hotel Yorba -Same Boy You've Always Known -Lovesick -Little Ghost -We're Going to Be Friends -The Hardest Button to Button -Black Math -The Nurse -I Just Don't Know What to Do With Myself
Encore: -Ball and Biscuit -Seven Nation Army -Screwdriver
Post by GratefulHippie on Jan 11, 2010 12:15:48 GMT -5
i recently got out of a relationship that started off as the best thing ever, and ended up a complicated mess. as it were, i'm completely over him, but he can't let go. i'm terrible at being the person who breaks up with someone because i hate being the reason someone is hurting.
but, i honestly don't think he knows what real love really is. he had it rough growing up, and i don't think he ever had a good role model for a healthy relationship. he's also really good at playing the victim, which i cannot STAND. i have one of the lowest thresholds for self-pity EVER. i tend to go straight to tough love if someone is just feeling sorry for themselves.
mostly, though, he lied to me. he still had feelings for his ex who doesn't even live here, and told me they never talked. a few checks of his text messages said otherwise.
ok, i don't know why i just went off, but i needed to get that off my chest. he's still calling and texting me, and it's like he's just TRYING to get me to be the bad guy because he knows i'll tell him i'm done. blah.
My 2 qualifications for a guy? Chemistry, and Attraction.
I think that should be all that matters, by setting a checklist for your life, you're setting yourself up for failure. Because really, when does life EVER go as planned? I've been attracted to all kinds of men, and they all bring something different to the table..
I also don't think anyone should set limitations, or expectations for a relationship. Such as a timeline, by date 5 we should be here in the relationship, and we can only be exclusive/nonexclusive for this long before reevaluating, blahblahblah...just go with the flow and see what happens, there's a surprise around every corner, so never walk a straight line
I'm working on 2 days of no sleep, so I don't know if any of this made sense, but I'll come back another time to evaluate how sane I am later..
I couldn't disagree with you more, at least some of what you said. Chemistry and attraction are such vague terms. I have chemistry and attraction to a ton of my female friends but I would never date any of them. After my last break up, on the recommendation of the girl I broke up with, I made a list of about 10 things that I look for in a woman. They are very simple -must have a career -must be a music fanatic, or at least understand my fanaticism, and realize that I spend all of my money on concerts, travel, and photography equipment for concerts -must have a physical attraction -must love kids and want at least one more (I have one and want another) -must live close to me or be willing to relocate close because my son lives 45 minutes from me and I'm not leaving him -must not be high maintenance -must be ok with party favors -must be ok with my shyness -must have good maternal instincts
I've dated several women lately who fit most of my "requirements" but not all and I knew that it wouldn't work. I'm not a stud by any means and I consider my personality lacking because I'm a little shy. But I still am going to be very picky in who I date because of my son.
However, I do not set expectations for any relationship and I do just go with the flow for the most part. I have learned a lot recently from past relationships and will put those lessons to good use when I find someone else. Bottom line is that relationships are hard work and I'm not going to waste my time in one that's not going anywhere. Just my two cents.
A Thieve's Parade 2/24 Conspirator 2/26 Kevin Smith 3/11 Keller 3/17 Papadosio 3/18 JJ Grey 3/25 Bela Fleck/Edgar Meyer 3/26 Toubab Krewe 3/27 O'Death 4/11 Budos Band 4/22 EOTO 4/28 Summer Camp 5/6-29 All Good
Am I the only one who thinks saying there has to be chemistry and attraction is unnecessary? Of course both have to be there! I'm on match.com right now and as soon as someone says that, I just want to skip the rest of his profile. It always seems to be code word for "must be hot."
But questionableinsanity, I like your list. It's realistic and has just enough room for interpretation that you're not closing yourself off.
Post by GratefulHippie on Jan 11, 2010 14:30:58 GMT -5
well, to be fair, there's a big difference between "must have a career" and "must be a theoretical metaphysicist"
there's something to be said for having a list of things you know for sure you want. i think that's where our standards come in. but it also says something about you if your list is so detailed that the size of their earlobes keeps you from at least giving it a try.
Post by insidejoke on Jan 11, 2010 14:35:45 GMT -5
First off, I'd just like to say that dating isn't near as much fun as I remember it being. Much love to all those out there working it.
I also have a list. However this list only pertains to a potential long-term partner. I still casually dated even if that person didn't meet many of the "terms and conditions" on my list because I like meeting new people, I love going out on nights that I don't have my children, and I'm not naive enough to think I know exactly what I want (i.e. the person that I might not see a future with may be just what I need). I'd also like to note that no one ever met my children or even stepped foot into my home unless they were long-term relationship material (since my divorce, two people have met my girls and only one has been invited into our home).
It's not my nature to be so rigid, but I really needed something to help me with the whole dating scene and to protect my wee ones from the carousel of Mommy's bad dates.
1. Is a good father or wants to have kids and be a good father (with preference going to someone who already has kids so I can see him in action) 2. Loves hiking/camping/boating/outdoors 3. Loves music/concerts/festivals and is OK with me going even if he doesn't want to go with me 4. Has a career, not a job 5. Is college educated 6. In between the ages of 29-41 7. Is OK with a big, crazy extended family and them being nearby and somewhat involved in my life 8. Athletic, with preference going to a former college athlete 9. Lives in or near my current hometown (i.e. no long distance relationships) 10. Can "work it" at professional events with me (cocktail parties, formal dinners, conferences, etc.) 11. Has love for and/or some sort of attachment to my alma mater (this is a big deal because I work for the university and live and breath all things IU) 12. Taller than me, with preference going to someone taller than me when I wear heels
So there you go. A little sneak peek into my brain. As a side note, I have found someone who met 11 of the 12 items on my list. The one thing he missed: he's 43. I think I can make an exception.
Am I the only one who thinks saying there has to be chemistry and attraction is unnecessary? Of course both have to be there! I'm on match.com right now and as soon as someone says that, I just want to skip the rest of his profile. It always seems to be code word for "must be hot."
But questionableinsanity, I like your list. It's realistic and has just enough room for interpretation that you're not closing yourself off.
Thanks Im doing the Match.com thing right now too. I've gone out on tons of dates to no avail. However, I recently "met" a reformed deadhead (I mean that she is now a professional who still loves the music) who is moving here in two weeks. Im stoked to actually meet her.
A Thieve's Parade 2/24 Conspirator 2/26 Kevin Smith 3/11 Keller 3/17 Papadosio 3/18 JJ Grey 3/25 Bela Fleck/Edgar Meyer 3/26 Toubab Krewe 3/27 O'Death 4/11 Budos Band 4/22 EOTO 4/28 Summer Camp 5/6-29 All Good
well, to be fair, there's a big difference between "must have a career" and "must be a theoretical metaphysicist"
there's something to be said for having a list of things you know for sure you want. i think that's where our standards come in. but it also says something about you if your list is so detailed that the size of their earlobes keeps you from at least giving it a try.
The career thing I got from insidejoke and it makes perfect sense to me. Anyone can have a job. Im not looking for just anyone. Im looking for a long term mate. That being said, I have heard that love can make you do weird things. So im keeping my options open.
A Thieve's Parade 2/24 Conspirator 2/26 Kevin Smith 3/11 Keller 3/17 Papadosio 3/18 JJ Grey 3/25 Bela Fleck/Edgar Meyer 3/26 Toubab Krewe 3/27 O'Death 4/11 Budos Band 4/22 EOTO 4/28 Summer Camp 5/6-29 All Good
I dated the same girl for four years, through college, through serving in Iraq with the USMC and lots of other life altering events. Just before we graduated we broke up, she canned me. Last Friday, which is more or less two and a half years later, she showed up to my doorstep unannounced and completellyyyy unexpected.. She told me that since we went our 'separate' ways, she has been searching for me and that she has realized she wants nothing but ME.
Almost three years later we are back together, and I feel confident in saying that we're in it for the long run
[edit- i know it is slightly off topic, but i thought i would share my happy news with my inforoo loves ;D]
A Thieve's Parade 2/24 Conspirator 2/26 Kevin Smith 3/11 Keller 3/17 Papadosio 3/18 JJ Grey 3/25 Bela Fleck/Edgar Meyer 3/26 Toubab Krewe 3/27 O'Death 4/11 Budos Band 4/22 EOTO 4/28 Summer Camp 5/6-29 All Good
Hey fellow singles! I'm new to the thread so I thought I'd introduce myself and make myself be known. I'm 25 and have been to Roo in '07 and '08 (wasn't able to go this past year). I've been single since June. I just thought it would be pretty cool to meet some new people with whom to experience all that is Bonnaroo.