Whether it's your first Bonnaroo or you’re a music festival veteran, we welcome you to Inforoo.
Here you'll find info about artists, rumors, camping tips, and the infamous Roo Clues. Have a look around then create an account and join in the fun. See you at Bonnaroo!!
Post by billypilgrim on Apr 28, 2010 13:38:15 GMT -5
A man and woman have sex in the backseat of his car. Afterwards, he says: "If I knew you were a virgin, I would have taken my time more." She responds: "If I knew you had more time, I would have taken off my pantyhose."
Providing an outlet and a voice for music lovers to unite under the common theme of music for all. Join The Pondo Army to show your allegiance to musical freedom! Fighting for no censorship of the arts & music education in schools, The Pondo Army will triumph! The Pondo Army Movement
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pondo ROCKS
Bonnafunky Dirtyroo has viking horns and a clock
Post by pondo ROCKS on May 1, 2010 23:03:40 GMT -5
In the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played.
Here is a guide to the point system:
SIMPLE DUTIES * You make the bed (+1) * You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0) * You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)
* You go out to buy her what she wants (+5) * In the rain (+8) * But return with Beer (-5)
* You check out a suspicious noise at night (+1) * You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing (0) * You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5) * You pummel it with iron rod (+10) * It's her pet (-20)
SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS * You stay by her side the entire party (0) * You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college buddy (-2) * Named Tina (-10) * Tina is a dancer (-20) * Tina has silicon implants (-80)
HER BIRTHDAY * You take her out to dinner (+2) * You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+3) * Okay, it's a sports bar (-2) * And it's all-you-can-eat night (-3) * It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colors of your favorite team (-10)
A NIGHT OUT * You take her to a movie (+1) * You take her to a movie she likes (+3) * You take her to a movie you hate (+6) * You take her to a movie you like (-2) * It's called 'Death Cop' (-3) * You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)
YOUR PHYSIQUE * You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15) * You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10) * You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts (-30) * You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too." (-8000)
THE BIG QUESTION * She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5) [Yes, you lose points no matter what] * You hesitate in responding (-10) * You reply, "Where?" (-35) * Any other response (-20)
COMMUNICATION * When she wants to talk about a problem , you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression (0) * You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50) * You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500) * She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-4000)
SEX * You cuddle with her after sex (+5) * You turn on the TV afterward while she's talking (-10) * The Channel is ESPN and SportsCenter is on (-25) * You say that a highlight you just saw was orgasmic, knowing she did not have an orgasmic experience (-1000000000000000000000000000000000000000000)
Providing an outlet and a voice for music lovers to unite under the common theme of music for all. Join The Pondo Army to show your allegiance to musical freedom! Fighting for no censorship of the arts & music education in schools, The Pondo Army will triumph! The Pondo Army Movement
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I hope I didn't post this before. I heard it on TV a few days ago. "Are cops always paranoid because every time they look in the mirror, they see a cop."
Post by pondo ROCKS on May 9, 2010 22:14:13 GMT -5
During a visit to the retirement home, I asked the director, “How do you determine whether or not a person should be institutionalized?”
“Well,” said the Director, “We fill up a bathtub, and then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub.”
“Oh, I understand,” I said. “A normal person would use the bucket because it’s bigger than the spoon or the teacup.”
“No,” said the Director. “A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?”
Providing an outlet and a voice for music lovers to unite under the common theme of music for all. Join The Pondo Army to show your allegiance to musical freedom! Fighting for no censorship of the arts & music education in schools, The Pondo Army will triumph! The Pondo Army Movement
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a bear is chasing a rabbit through the forest. they trip over a magic lamp and a genie pops out. the genie says he will grant each animal 3 wishes. the bear's first wish is that all the other bears in the forest be female. the rabbit's first wish is for a little motorcycle built just for his size. the bear is excited at this point and asks for all the bears in the country to be turned into females. the rabbits second wish is for a little motorcycle helmet to go with his new bike. the bear at this point is so excited at the thought of all the bears in the country being female that he makes his third wish that all the bears in the world besides him are female. at this point the genie asks the rabbit what his third wish will be. the rabbit looks up and says "i wish that bear right there was gay" and takes off on his motorcycle.
Providing an outlet and a voice for music lovers to unite under the common theme of music for all. Join The Pondo Army to show your allegiance to musical freedom! Fighting for no censorship of the arts & music education in schools, The Pondo Army will triumph! The Pondo Army Movement
Follow me on twitter@Pondoknowsbest
Post by billypilgrim on Jun 28, 2010 18:22:24 GMT -5
A man in a bar at closing time asked the bartender about the large gong hanging in a corner. The bartender said, "It's a talking clock. Would you like to see how it works?" The man said he would. So the bartender picked up a rubber mallet and banged the gong. After a few seconds, the man heard a voice from the other side of the wall shouting: "Hey, asshole! It's 2 in the morning!"
Providing an outlet and a voice for music lovers to unite under the common theme of music for all. Join The Pondo Army to show your allegiance to musical freedom! Fighting for no censorship of the arts & music education in schools, The Pondo Army will triumph! The Pondo Army Movement
Follow me on twitter@Pondoknowsbest
What do you call a Spanish women with no legs? Consuelo
What is a nun in a blended: Twisted Sister
What does a dildo and soybean have in common? Both are meat substitutes.
What do you call a naked blond doing a handstand? A Burnett with bad breath.
Proctologist is at lunch, when someone asked about the thermometer behind his ear. "Damn, some ass-hole has my pen."
Farrah Fawcett at the gates of Heaven. St Peter blesses her for being an Angel on earth by giving her one wish before she crosses into heaven. So for her wish, Farrah asks that all the children in the world be safe. 4 hours later Micheal Jackson died.
Post by indigrainbow on Jul 16, 2010 12:07:26 GMT -5
you might be addicted to the arcade if
6. you find yourself speaking in enigmatic 3 word phrases 5. you get pulled over, cop says you were speeding, and you say "false! TPBM likes tuna" 4. someone wrongly accuses you of stealing something from them and you immediately try to figure out who the other mafia members are they are working with 3. the arcade is your homepage 2. cashier asks you "paper or plastic" and you respond "paper. cinnamon or mango?" 1. you are mike d
"The possibility of physical and mental collapse is now very real. No sympathy for the Devil, keep that in mind. Buy the ticket, take the ride. " Raoul Duke
pondo ROCKS
Bonnafunky Dirtyroo has viking horns and a clock
Providing an outlet and a voice for music lovers to unite under the common theme of music for all. Join The Pondo Army to show your allegiance to musical freedom! Fighting for no censorship of the arts & music education in schools, The Pondo Army will triumph! The Pondo Army Movement
Follow me on twitter@Pondoknowsbest
"The possibility of physical and mental collapse is now very real. No sympathy for the Devil, keep that in mind. Buy the ticket, take the ride. " Raoul Duke
pondo ROCKS
Bonnafunky Dirtyroo has viking horns and a clock
Post by pondo ROCKS on Sept 20, 2010 7:56:31 GMT -5
The varying degrees of success in life...
At age 4 success is not peeing in your pants. At age 12 success is having friends. At age 16 success is having a drivers license. At age 20 success is having sex. At age 35 success is having money. At age 50 success is having money. At age 60 success is having sex. At age 70 success is having a drivers license. At age 75 success is having friends. At age 80 success is not peeing in your pants.
Providing an outlet and a voice for music lovers to unite under the common theme of music for all. Join The Pondo Army to show your allegiance to musical freedom! Fighting for no censorship of the arts & music education in schools, The Pondo Army will triumph! The Pondo Army Movement
Follow me on twitter@Pondoknowsbest
Post by midnightmark on Sept 20, 2010 11:04:29 GMT -5
A sex researcher phones one of his participants in a recent survey of his to check on a discrepancy. He asks the man,"In response to the question on frequency of sex you answered' twice weekly'. Your wife, on the other hand, answered 'several times a night'."
"That's right," replied the man. "And that's how it's going to stay until our second mortgage is paid off."
Providing an outlet and a voice for music lovers to unite under the common theme of music for all. Join The Pondo Army to show your allegiance to musical freedom! Fighting for no censorship of the arts & music education in schools, The Pondo Army will triumph! The Pondo Army Movement
Follow me on twitter@Pondoknowsbest
pondo ROCKS
Bonnafunky Dirtyroo has viking horns and a clock
'Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home.. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal.. If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her..
So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of sh!t.'
Providing an outlet and a voice for music lovers to unite under the common theme of music for all. Join The Pondo Army to show your allegiance to musical freedom! Fighting for no censorship of the arts & music education in schools, The Pondo Army will triumph! The Pondo Army Movement
Follow me on twitter@Pondoknowsbest
Post by midnightmark on Oct 6, 2010 2:04:52 GMT -5
A young Indian boy spent most of his life in quandary. He felt so different and just couldn't figure out why he was so depressed. He went to the Chief for answers. He asked the Chief how his brother 'Running Deer' had gotten his name...
The Chief answered in his Typical poetic way," When Running Deer was born, at the moment of his birth, the first thing his mother saw was a beautiful deer running into the forest. And so Running Deer was named. It is the custom of our tribe to name the offspring according to the spirits in nature visiting upon the birth.
Then the boy asked the Chief how his sister 'Thundering Bird' got her name. The Chief described again, how at the moment of her birth Thundering Birds mother heard a roar of thunder and looking up, saw a bird soaring through the sky.
The boy asked again how his cousin 'White Crouching Bear' had been given such a name. The Chief looking down once more at the boy, explains how White Crouching Bears mother had seen a rare white bear crouching over a stream at the moment of her baby's birth. Then he questioned the boy.
"Why do you ask, 'Two Dogs F ucking?"
Last Edit: Oct 6, 2010 2:08:08 GMT -5 by midnightmark - Back to Top
pondo ROCKS
Bonnafunky Dirtyroo has viking horns and a clock
Providing an outlet and a voice for music lovers to unite under the common theme of music for all. Join The Pondo Army to show your allegiance to musical freedom! Fighting for no censorship of the arts & music education in schools, The Pondo Army will triumph! The Pondo Army Movement
Follow me on twitter@Pondoknowsbest
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