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Jesus Christ, holls. I used to have a list like that then I narrowed it down to 1 rule:
1) Makes me laugh and smile.
Anything past that is just a plus.
hahahaha, GL! This is my PERFECT GUY! If all I wanted was somebody to make me laugh, I'd date a stand-up comic who loves country music & watches NASCAR. (Actually, considering my location, that's a far more attainable goal.)
I've been told repeatedly to lower my standards. What can I say? If you're gonna dream, then dream big!
Really, now: who plays the lottery hoping to win only ten bucks?
Jesus Christ, holls. I used to have a list like that then I narrowed it down to 1 rule:
1) Makes me laugh and smile.
Anything past that is just a plus.
hahahaha, GL! This is my PERFECT GUY! If all I wanted was somebody to make me laugh, I'd date a stand-up comic who loves country music & watches NASCAR. (Actually, considering my location, that's a far more attainable goal.)
I've been told repeatedly to lower my standards. What can I say? If you're gonna dream, then dream big!
Really, now: who plays the lottery hoping to win only ten bucks?
And I won't ever tell you to go against your standards. They are what they are for a reason. I've just learned that everything else is bullshit, to me, unless that person can make me laugh. If they can't .. there really is no point.
I used to dream about finding someone, when I was in my 20's, that fit a lot of what you said. I realized, in short, that I was missing out. Nobody could ever fit my criteria. I wasn't being fair to anyone else (or myself, for that matter).
I know these rules can be broken (and I'm sure they have) on a person-by-person case. I would just allow myself the possibility of falling for someone outside of those parameters.
They ARE out there. You just have to find each other.
Last Edit: Aug 19, 2012 15:07:40 GMT -5 by Deleted - Back to Top
If a guy has 16 of the 25, is he worthwhile? 18? 20?
^ABSOLUTELY! If I hadn't been lucky enough to have found 2 guys (the only ones I ever truly loved) who had nearly ALL these traits, then I'd definitely give up hope & adopt a dozen cats! Yeah...16 ain't too shabby. But why settle for 16 when you could have 20? Or, heaven forbid, all 25?
Bottom line: "The heart has its reasons which reason knows nothing of." ~Blaise Pascal "The logic of the heart is absurd." ~Julie de Lespinasse (that crazy 18th-century French writer chick who died of a broken heart...her rose-colored glasses *definitely* needed Windex!)
Maybe I'll just get a puppy. Dogs are capable of #25, even if the trade-off is that they eat my shoes. It's all about compromise, huh?
I say because, the guy might have most of the traits you want - he still could be an asshole. He may not want much to do with you. Or be flakey. You never know what might come along. Maybe someone with 16 treats you real well and gives you tons of love and respect. But if you chase 24 that's kind of an asshole and just uses you for killing time...
Welcome back Bonz, but I do not find it strange that your presence being requested in the Orgy thread and then you showing up, like it was the quacking Bonzai Bat Signal.
Post by A$AP Rosko on Aug 21, 2012 12:10:25 GMT -5
Oh, man...this is embarrassing. I feel like you need to explain the context of that, Bonnie . Just so that all of Inforoo doesn't think I'm some big sleazebag perv...might be too late for that, though.
To clarify, this was actually in regards to our height. He would let me borrow a few inches of his height (if it were possible) so that I can see the stage when in a tent.. It came out completely wrong and completely funny.
Welcome back Bonz, but I do not find it strange that your presence being requested in the Orgy thread and then you showing up, like it was the quacking Bonzai Bat Signal.
To clarify, this was actually in regards to our height. He would let me borrow a few inches of his height (if it were possible) so that I can see the stage when in a tent.. It came out completely wrong and completely funny.
She forgot the part about Karosko's nickname being Big Jim Slade
I'm not the right person to talk to about it, though. I never expected anything from anyone. I've always hated those dating "rules". They wreak of misogyny.
Post by abrakapokus on Aug 23, 2012 7:58:29 GMT -5
3 dates isn't really enough to expect anything really. I think around three is when you decide if you move on to someone else or if this is a person you are going to try to build a relationship with.
First two times we were together I really enjoyed it but last night was just a little off. Tried holding her hand and sneaking a kiss but she wouldn't have either. Can't tell if she is really into me or if I am just humoring her because I'm foreign and she's bored?
We're going out again saturday. Feel like I will have a decision to make after that.
Post by Dave Maynar on Aug 23, 2012 8:11:39 GMT -5
She is Korean, right? Is there a different societal norm about such things over there? Hand holding and a kiss aren't out of line for a third date here, but it may be different there.
She is Korean, right? Is there a different societal norm about such things over there? Hand holding and a kiss aren't out of line for a third date here, but it may be different there.
Yeah, maybe you just tried to rape her but you don't know it.
She is Korean, right? Is there a different societal norm about such things over there? Hand holding and a kiss aren't out of line for a third date here, but it may be different there.
Yeah, maybe you just tried to rape her but you don't know it.
Welcome back Bonz, but I do not find it strange that your presence being requested in the Orgy thread and then you showing up, like it was the quacking Bonzai Bat Signal.
First two times we were together I really enjoyed it but last night was just a little off. Tried holding her hand and sneaking a kiss but she wouldn't have either. Can't tell if she is really into me or if I am just humoring her because I'm foreign and she's bored?
We're going out again saturday. Feel like I will have a decision to make after that.
If these took place in public I would say you probably are moving much faster than she is used to. From what I understand, PDAs aren't very common in general and certainly not for a new couple.
From what I know, PDA is huge here. The idea of couples is practically shoved down koreans' throats as a social norm. If you are in your 20s and not dating then there is something wrong with you. The thing is, from the many foreign guys who have tried dating korean girls, is that -to koreans-it is all about an image. Yes, as Dave suggested, they move very very slow, but will jump on the first chance to display that they have a significant other. That's why I thought hand-holding and a quick kiss by the subway stop on my way home would be in the bag.
The fact that she hesitated and denied me on both counts shows either a) I severely underestimated just how slow this girl wants to go b) she is playing me or b) my insecurities from getting screwed over in the past have followed me 7,000 miles across the world.
The fact that she hesitated and denied me on both counts shows either a) I severely underestimated just how slow this girl wants to go b) she is playing me or b) my insecurities from getting screwed over in the past have followed me 7,000 miles across the world.
It sounds like it might be a combination of B and C?
On the next date, how about taking the direct approach and just ASK HER how she feels about PDA. It's been my experience that talking about things prevents much misunderstanding. Good luck!
PS - you think maybe she's nervous about you having had pink eye? just a thought...
PS - you think maybe she's nervous about you having had pink eye? just a thought...
Man this never even crossed my mind.
Paranoia aside, I think what it really is is that she is just unsure about my being a foreigner. Korea is a very homogenous country. It's not the melting pot that is the United States. I think the girls here that do date foreigners have usually dabbled outside of Korea before, meaning they've at least visited Europe or North America or even gone to school there.
This girl I'm seeing has never even left Korea before, let alone date North American scum like myself. I can tell she is interested but she is probably unsure of how far she wants to go with this.
In other news- Friday is two of my coworkers' going away party, along with another coworker's birthday. I'm just going to get really drunk and not think about it.