How old to Roo? opinions wanted

At fifteen I once hopped on a bus with 30$ in my pocket and went to NYC for a weekend. I had no places lined up to stay and was equipped with a piece of paper that had friends names and numbers on it.

It was completely irresponsible. And poorly executed. I had a blast and would do it all over again in a second.

I also suffer from an intense case of wanderlust and an affinity for the unknown and unplanned. I'm an OCD's worst nightmare.

I feel you. I hate missing out on things. Although, even I would've stopped you at 11.

Those "parental advisory" stickers were the basis of many debates between my parents and my friends parents in my middle school years. My dad, being a musician and music lover always said he would never censor what I wanted to listen to. Some parents just don't understand. Mine did. And they usually won the debate.

My two cents.

I was 19 my first bonnaroo, 2011. I had been to concerts basically my whole life. My first show was KISS and Aerosmith in like 2000. I know people twice my age who haven't been to half the huge shows I'd seen by the time I went to bonnaroo the first time and I thought I could handle the crowd. I was also in the drumline all through high school and band camp was held at ttu, middle tn in the middle of the summer and we went from sun up to sun down so I thought I could handle the heat. I was better equipped than some people my age because my family loves to go camping so I had basically everything I needed to survive, plus some really cool neighbors at roo '11. I had been reading the boards from basically the end of roo 2010 when my friends got back and told me about it. I had never been so amped up for anything in my life and I went on my own because none of my friends could make it. I remember getting there Thursday afternoon and getting parked fairly close and walking out of camp towards centeroo. No amount of concerts, hot days marching in the sun, or reading could've prepared me for what happened those four days. I met a lot of friends, saw a lot of crazy stuff, did a lot of things for the first time, missed a lot of shows I wanted to see and was dazed by the end of day foor. It was the most magical weekend of my life. But I know, deep down as I did then, there is no way I personally could've done it at 15 or 16 and there's not many people I know that could've. It's the most grueling four days of the year for me. But I wouldn't trade them for the world. I'd say go to a few big shows and see if you can handle the crowd. I saw motley Crüe when I was your age and it was AWESOME! Go camping some. Get used to being out in the heat because it's very present. There's a lot of shows you'll miss you'll never get again. I missed Robert Plant in 2011 and I was there. I regret it to this day because I'll probably never get that chance again. But that's life. Be a kid while you can. Bonnaroo is very intense and you don't want your first experience at what a lot of us consider a second home to be bad.

I was 20 during my first Roo 2011 and it was a struggle to say the least. At 15 with the extreme heat coupled with alcohol and the temptation of drugs I don't think I would have survived. Now everyone is different and some kids are more mature and can handle the different challenges Bonnaroo may present, but if I was a parent I would not let a 15 year old go unsupervised.

Seriously? I can't be the only one that was pushing the fun envelope at 15.

Is Bonnaroo really that much of a challenge? I know it's one of the longest and biggest. And I would never advise anyone not to over prepare. But it's not dangerous.



I really love you all and this debate.

I pushed the envelope at 15. I snuck off to older people shows and Black Flag and Bad Brains shows when I was 15. I survived. These were one-night shows close to my house and I had difficult access to drugs and booze and other things despite my immature search and desire for them. Regardless of the things I did find at 15, I did survive.

Survival is not the only important thing to consider in this question though. When I pushed the envelope at 15, I did some things and things were done to me that I survived, but that I wish I could take back. I wish they didn't happen to me, because I still think about them often and sometimes I'm afraid they made me less than what I could have been as a grown man.

There was no Bonnaroo when I was 15. Going to Bonnaroo at 15 without anyone older is more than pushing the envelope in my opinion. This has nothing to do with inherent dangers or challenges of Bonnaroo, but rather the wider range of opportunities to make an irreversible mistake at an age where logic and reason are still underdeveloped. When advantage almost always goes to someone other than the 15-year-old. I believe a mature 15 year old could go solo to Bonnaroo and have a great time and get in no trouble and come out unscathed. In fact, if given odds, I believe the odds would favor that occurring over something different. However, as someone who's been there - really been there, and someone who has a 14 year old child, 99-1 against something happening aren't even odds I'm comfortable with.

I respect your opinion as always, Karen, but I disagree. I think a 15 year old can have a wonderful time with someone older to watch over and then when their feet are wet and they have a lay of the land, and a little more experience of life under their belt - fly solo and get to odds that I'd bet on.

^^^I got into so much trouble at 15. I left home for days at a time, ingested crazy amounts of dangerous substances, and put myself in really sketchy situations at times. I was also put in bad situations by people who were older and more experienced, some of which had long-term repercussions. your brain is still developing, and the logic and reasoning functions are not fully formed until your early 20s (not a subjective observation, a scientific fact). I respect the OP's decision to reconsider, and put off going to Bonnaroo for a few years.

the fact is, while it's an amazing community and experience, as a 15-yr-old, you don't know how you would react to a true emergency, such as a friend, or even yourself, not drinking enough water and getting seriously dehydrated, someone harassing you, someone stealing your stuff (unlikely, but could happen), and it's impossible to predict how you would navigate the crowds, the heat, the access to drugs, etc. 
as an adult at Roo I have dealt with rowdy, rude tent neighbors, a guy who literally passed out cold in my screen tent, and a man yelling outside of my tent for hours that we were all going to hell, among other situations. don't think I could have handled some of that as a teenager.

side note: I wholeheartedly agree with adults bringing their kids to fests (as long as you're prepared, and aware that the experience will be different as a result). I have taken my daughter to Roo twice, and last year, at the age of 12, she had people come up and ask her where to find molly (with me standing beside her), and one guy who told her how much he liked the LED lights on her camelbak by saying "those lights are fucking amazing man, shit, where did you find them?" etc. 
she and I had many conversations in preparation so she knew how to handle herself. but even with her experience, intelligence and maturity level, can I imagine her going solo to Bonnaroo as a teenager? hell no. I would probably be ok with her going with a group of friends at 18, but even then I would worry a little (hey, I'm a mom, what do you expect?)

anyway, appreciate seeing all the discussion. I second/third/whatever others' suggestions to check out Shaky Knees and Music Midtown. much more manageable fests for this situation, IMO. best of luck!!

I hear you Karen - I think this is a great discussion. My hope by taking my kids to all these music festivals at young ages is that maybe they're better prepared to do things on their own at a younger age than their peers. The key as o'neil said is conversation and communication.  I want my kids to hear, see, and know about drugs and sex and alcohol and nudity and strange words in songs from me and Mrs. L first.  They will hear and learn from other kids and teachers and TV and movies, but I want my perspective to be the imprint.  Bonnaroo has been a great place for us to do that. 

I would not allow my 15 year old go without me.

17, almost 18, well you're an adult almost anyway.

15. Nope. I'll take you, otherwise you aren't going would be the answer for my son or daughter.

This is a good discussion, especially as we come to terms with our own early lives and look ahead at others.

One of the things I like about 1Karen1's NY story is that she did have a set of names and numbers there. While there may be elements of risk here, you didn't go in completely blind. And frankly it's that potential blindness that I would worry about at Bonnaroo -- if you don't have some folks you can lean on, Roo - even just statistically with the weather - can be tough. Thank goodness it's better than it used to be; early Bonnaroo's had literally NO cell service. It was like being technology blind for four days and tough to even communicate with the people you came with (I remember my Roo tub used to have a dry erase board and post it notes for conveying messages at camp when texts didn't work).

This is a great idea

hi. so I've spoken with my mom. and she is planning on volunteering. I'll be at the fest and do my own thing. while she does hers. I will bring probably 2 or 3 friends. I will check in with my mom a time or two each day.
do you think this is a reasonable compromise?

That sounds like a good compromise. 

Keep in mind that your mom would be camping in volunteer camping, so you and your friends would need a separate campsite (I believe, correct me if I'm wrong though).

Last year was my first Roo at 18 with 4 of my friends in 2 cars. We drove 13 hours and I was the one who did most of the planning/research. I was really worried about things going wrong during the trip, but it was smooth sailing for the most part. Any situation that we were thrown it taught us a lot and it was a great experience. I think that age thing depends mostly on maturity level and ability to make your own decisions. That being said, I think at any age younger than 17, I would've had a bad time with not knowing what to do/not being prepared. 

And ultimately it's up to your parents, but mine weren't too hard to convince so long as I showed that we had a plan and were serious (inforoo helped out a TON with planning!)