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Post by 3post1jack1 on Sept 10, 2024 16:46:00 GMT -5
so in late June this past year i was at work feeling fine and had a full-blown panic attack seemingly out of nowhere. dizzy, heart racing, the whole deal. luckily i'd had panic attacks before so i knew what it was, but it'd probably been 15 years. the panic attacks and general anxiety continued, for a week, then we went under contract on a new house, which is great but my god it's a whole new level of stress and the general panic and anxiety continued throughout July. for all of July i tried to deal with it by avoidance, basically giving into the "fight or flight" response of panic by fleeing, sometimes physically leaving a location or more frequently just mentally trying to "think of something else" instead of the panic. spoiler alert that didn't work. finally went to the doctor the day before we moved in august, who got me on some meds and i started meditating twice a day.
i thought i'd been taking care of myself before that, and i was in a lot of ways: eating pretty decent, exercising regularly, having downtime and sleeping enough etc. but my meditation/mindfulness practice had pretty much been nonexistent for a year at that point. and i had a lot going on in my life that i wasn't allowing myself to feel. dying father-in-law who we had just put into hospice, (which is why i ended up bailing on bonnaroo), father-in-law then dying in late July, still grappling with the death of my mom from a few years prior and my mother in law before that, and normal work type stress on top.
it was painful at first sitting in meditation and just letting that anxiety happen rather than try to avoid it, but i realized what i'd been doing was unconsciously ignoring my own bad feelings for a year, under the pretense that i needed to be "strong" for my wife, who had been dealing with so much since her dad had a stroke the year prior. which is horseshit, there is no way we can be there for the people we love if we don't take care of ourselves.
so with a little help from an SSRI and a little help from meditation, here i am six weeks out from seeing the doc and feeling a lot better. my relationship to anxiety changed. it's just a physical thing that happens, it's my amygdala trying to protect me from danger, but unfortunately the amygdala is dumb. it's trying it's best but it's dumb. so when that anxiety starts i tell myself "thanks amygdala i know you are trying to help, but maybe lets let the prefrontal cortex deal with this instead" and i close my eyes and breathe and try to spark some curiousity about all the things happening in my body: heart racing, chills, weird physical pain, etc. and wouldn't you know it these attacks pass much quicker and are much less intense when i open myself up to them rather than try to avoid them.
in our bodies, in our minds, in our lives, things arise and pass away. you don't need any faith to believe this, you can observe it in yourself. all you have to do is sit and know you are sitting. notice how your breathing happens automatically and pay attention to it. when something calls your attention away from the breath focus on that instead, when that passes away, as it inevitably will, return to the breath. rinse and repeat. every time you return to the breathe it's like doing a rep on your emotional muscles.
while i didn't want to avoid things, during this initial period of recovery i did find myself drawn to calmer art. so older movies that move a bit slower, or music that is a little more chill. the point of this whole post is after years of struggling to understand them, i've ceased fighting and allowed Krungbang into my life. I get it now, it's music for people who are recovering from panic disorder, and I'm grateful for it.
so in late June this past year i was at work feeling fine and had a full-blown panic attack seemingly out of nowhere. dizzy, heart racing, the whole deal. luckily i'd had panic attacks before so i knew what it was, but it'd probably been 15 years. the panic attacks and general anxiety continued, for a week, then we went under contract on a new house, which is great but my god it's a whole new level of stress and the general panic and anxiety continued throughout July. for all of July i tried to deal with it by avoidance, basically giving into the "fight or flight" response of panic by fleeing, sometimes physically leaving a location or more frequently just mentally trying to "think of something else" instead of the panic. spoiler alert that didn't work. finally went to the doctor the day before we moved in august, who got me on some meds and i started meditating twice a day.
i thought i'd been taking care of myself before that, and i was in a lot of ways: eating pretty decent, exercising regularly, having downtime and sleeping enough etc. but my meditation/mindfulness practice had pretty much been nonexistent for a year at that point. and i had a lot going on in my life that i wasn't allowing myself to feel. dying father-in-law who we had just put into hospice, (which is why i ended up bailing on bonnaroo), father-in-law then dying in late July, still grappling with the death of my mom from a few years prior and my mother in law before that, and normal work type stress on top.
it was painful at first sitting in meditation and just letting that anxiety happen rather than try to avoid it, but i realized what i'd been doing was unconsciously ignoring my own bad feelings for a year, under the pretense that i needed to be "strong" for my wife, who had been dealing with so much since her dad had a stroke the year prior. which is horseshit, there is no way we can be there for the people we love if we don't take care of ourselves.
so with a little help from an SSRI and a little help from meditation, here i am six weeks out from seeing the doc and feeling a lot better. my relationship to anxiety changed. it's just a physical thing that happens, it's my amygdala trying to protect me from danger, but unfortunately the amygdala is dumb. it's trying it's best but it's dumb. so when that anxiety starts i tell myself "thanks amygdala i know you are trying to help, but maybe lets let the prefrontal cortex deal with this instead" and i close my eyes and breathe and try to spark some curiousity about all the things happening in my body: heart racing, chills, weird physical pain, etc. and wouldn't you know it these attacks pass much quicker and are much less intense when i open myself up to them rather than try to avoid them.
in our bodies, in our minds, in our lives, things arise and pass away. you don't need any faith to believe this, you can observe it in yourself. all you have to do is sit and know you are sitting. notice how your breathing happens automatically and pay attention to it. when something calls your attention away from the breath focus on that instead, when that passes away, as it inevitably will, return to the breath. rinse and repeat. every time you return to the breathe it's like doing a rep on your emotional muscles.
while i didn't want to avoid things, during this initial period of recovery i did find myself drawn to calmer art. so older movies that move a bit slower, or music that is a little more chill. the point of this whole post is after years of struggling to understand them, i've ceased fighting and allowed Krungbang into my life. I get it now, it's music for people who are recovering from panic disorder, and I'm grateful for it.
i low key needed this today. thanks for sharing. (on my own anxiety/meditation journey atm, and although not fun i'm glad yours brought you to krungbungin and that's all that matters)
so in late June this past year i was at work feeling fine and had a full-blown panic attack seemingly out of nowhere. dizzy, heart racing, the whole deal. luckily i'd had panic attacks before so i knew what it was, but it'd probably been 15 years. the panic attacks and general anxiety continued, for a week, then we went under contract on a new house, which is great but my god it's a whole new level of stress and the general panic and anxiety continued throughout July. for all of July i tried to deal with it by avoidance, basically giving into the "fight or flight" response of panic by fleeing, sometimes physically leaving a location or more frequently just mentally trying to "think of something else" instead of the panic. spoiler alert that didn't work. finally went to the doctor the day before we moved in august, who got me on some meds and i started meditating twice a day.
i thought i'd been taking care of myself before that, and i was in a lot of ways: eating pretty decent, exercising regularly, having downtime and sleeping enough etc. but my meditation/mindfulness practice had pretty much been nonexistent for a year at that point. and i had a lot going on in my life that i wasn't allowing myself to feel. dying father-in-law who we had just put into hospice, (which is why i ended up bailing on bonnaroo), father-in-law then dying in late July, still grappling with the death of my mom from a few years prior and my mother in law before that, and normal work type stress on top.
it was painful at first sitting in meditation and just letting that anxiety happen rather than try to avoid it, but i realized what i'd been doing was unconsciously ignoring my own bad feelings for a year, under the pretense that i needed to be "strong" for my wife, who had been dealing with so much since her dad had a stroke the year prior. which is horseshit, there is no way we can be there for the people we love if we don't take care of ourselves.
so with a little help from an SSRI and a little help from meditation, here i am six weeks out from seeing the doc and feeling a lot better. my relationship to anxiety changed. it's just a physical thing that happens, it's my amygdala trying to protect me from danger, but unfortunately the amygdala is dumb. it's trying it's best but it's dumb. so when that anxiety starts i tell myself "thanks amygdala i know you are trying to help, but maybe lets let the prefrontal cortex deal with this instead" and i close my eyes and breathe and try to spark some curiousity about all the things happening in my body: heart racing, chills, weird physical pain, etc. and wouldn't you know it these attacks pass much quicker and are much less intense when i open myself up to them rather than try to avoid them.
in our bodies, in our minds, in our lives, things arise and pass away. you don't need any faith to believe this, you can observe it in yourself. all you have to do is sit and know you are sitting. notice how your breathing happens automatically and pay attention to it. when something calls your attention away from the breath focus on that instead, when that passes away, as it inevitably will, return to the breath. rinse and repeat. every time you return to the breathe it's like doing a rep on your emotional muscles.
while i didn't want to avoid things, during this initial period of recovery i did find myself drawn to calmer art. so older movies that move a bit slower, or music that is a little more chill. the point of this whole post is after years of struggling to understand them, i've ceased fighting and allowed Krungbang into my life. I get it now, it's music for people who are recovering from panic disorder, and I'm grateful for it.
Panic attacks, stress, and anxiety are the worst. I'm glad you are starting to take care of yourself and put in the work.
Yoga helps me, oh meditation and weed too. But yeah, big hugs.
This is the first message board I've ever been on, the only reason I joined is because I love Bonnaroo and wanted to read and talk about it all year long.
so in late June this past year i was at work feeling fine and had a full-blown panic attack seemingly out of nowhere. dizzy, heart racing, the whole deal. luckily i'd had panic attacks before so i knew what it was, but it'd probably been 15 years. the panic attacks and general anxiety continued, for a week, then we went under contract on a new house, which is great but my god it's a whole new level of stress and the general panic and anxiety continued throughout July. for all of July i tried to deal with it by avoidance, basically giving into the "fight or flight" response of panic by fleeing, sometimes physically leaving a location or more frequently just mentally trying to "think of something else" instead of the panic. spoiler alert that didn't work. finally went to the doctor the day before we moved in august, who got me on some meds and i started meditating twice a day.
i thought i'd been taking care of myself before that, and i was in a lot of ways: eating pretty decent, exercising regularly, having downtime and sleeping enough etc. but my meditation/mindfulness practice had pretty much been nonexistent for a year at that point. and i had a lot going on in my life that i wasn't allowing myself to feel. dying father-in-law who we had just put into hospice, (which is why i ended up bailing on bonnaroo), father-in-law then dying in late July, still grappling with the death of my mom from a few years prior and my mother in law before that, and normal work type stress on top.
it was painful at first sitting in meditation and just letting that anxiety happen rather than try to avoid it, but i realized what i'd been doing was unconsciously ignoring my own bad feelings for a year, under the pretense that i needed to be "strong" for my wife, who had been dealing with so much since her dad had a stroke the year prior. which is horseshit, there is no way we can be there for the people we love if we don't take care of ourselves.
so with a little help from an SSRI and a little help from meditation, here i am six weeks out from seeing the doc and feeling a lot better. my relationship to anxiety changed. it's just a physical thing that happens, it's my amygdala trying to protect me from danger, but unfortunately the amygdala is dumb. it's trying it's best but it's dumb. so when that anxiety starts i tell myself "thanks amygdala i know you are trying to help, but maybe lets let the prefrontal cortex deal with this instead" and i close my eyes and breathe and try to spark some curiousity about all the things happening in my body: heart racing, chills, weird physical pain, etc. and wouldn't you know it these attacks pass much quicker and are much less intense when i open myself up to them rather than try to avoid them.
in our bodies, in our minds, in our lives, things arise and pass away. you don't need any faith to believe this, you can observe it in yourself. all you have to do is sit and know you are sitting. notice how your breathing happens automatically and pay attention to it. when something calls your attention away from the breath focus on that instead, when that passes away, as it inevitably will, return to the breath. rinse and repeat. every time you return to the breathe it's like doing a rep on your emotional muscles.
while i didn't want to avoid things, during this initial period of recovery i did find myself drawn to calmer art. so older movies that move a bit slower, or music that is a little more chill. the point of this whole post is after years of struggling to understand them, i've ceased fighting and allowed Krungbang into my life. I get it now, it's music for people who are recovering from panic disorder, and I'm grateful for it.
Khruangbin has honestly helped me in my life too, so this is validating to hear.
Panic attacks, stress, and anxiety are the worst. I'm glad you are starting to take care of yourself and put in the work.
Yoga helps me, oh meditation and weed too. But yeah, big hugs.
i've been doing yoga too! after resisting for years because it's so hard for me.
a friend of mine said something about yoga that really opened it up for me. he said it's more about the breathing than the stretching. i was like oh damn. and when i started focusing on my breathing instead of being frustrating with how inflexible i am wouldn't you know my flexibility started getting better.
Panic attacks, stress, and anxiety are the worst. I'm glad you are starting to take care of yourself and put in the work.
Yoga helps me, oh meditation and weed too. But yeah, big hugs.
i've been doing yoga too! after resisting for years because it's so hard for me.
a friend of mine said something about yoga that really opened it up for me. he said it's more about the breathing than the stretching. i was like oh damn. and when i started focusing on my breathing instead of being frustrating with how inflexible i am wouldn't you know my flexibility started getting better.
The hardest part is making to the mat. Breathing is definitely the key and listening to your body. Of course you can even do it while listening to Khruangbin!
Panic attacks, stress, and anxiety are the worst. I'm glad you are starting to take care of yourself and put in the work.
Yoga helps me, oh meditation and weed too. But yeah, big hugs.
i've been doing yoga too! after resisting for years because it's so hard for me.
a friend of mine said something about yoga that really opened it up for me. he said it's more about the breathing than the stretching. i was like oh damn. and when i started focusing on my breathing instead of being frustrating with how inflexible i am wouldn't you know my flexibility started getting better.
look into restore yoga classes, it’s the perfect combination of meditation/breathing and yoga. they have you hold positions longer and it’s truly such a relaxing class. hot yoga is a lot of fun too if you want a more intense workout
i've been doing yoga too! after resisting for years because it's so hard for me.
a friend of mine said something about yoga that really opened it up for me. he said it's more about the breathing than the stretching. i was like oh damn. and when i started focusing on my breathing instead of being frustrating with how inflexible i am wouldn't you know my flexibility started getting better.
look into restore yoga classes, it’s the perfect combination of meditation/breathing and yoga. they have you hold positions longer and it’s truly such a relaxing class. hot yoga is a lot of fun too if you want a more intense workout
Here's my updated best guess, I'm listing it the old school way because who knows what days they play.
Dua Lipa - Tame Impala - Childish Gambino Charli XCX - Rufus Du Sol - Alanis Morisette Justice - Fisher - Modest Mouse - Flaming Lips
I'm not entirely convinced that Gambino is out of consideration, but I'd personally make a best guess of penciling in Phish if he doesn't end up on the lineup.
Here's my updated best guess, I'm listing it the old school way because who knows what days they play.
Dua Lipa - Tame Impala - Childish Gambino Charli XCX - Rufus Du Sol - Alanis Morisette Justice - Fisher - Modest Mouse - Flaming Lips
I'm not entirely convinced that Gambino is out of consideration, but I'd personally make a best guess of penciling in Phish if he doesn't end up on the lineup.
