Whether it's your first Bonnaroo or you’re a music festival veteran, we welcome you to Inforoo.
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Hey all! I have wanted to go to Bonnaroo ever since i was 15, and now this summer I will be 18 and graduated from high school so I feel like it is the perfect time for me to head down to the Roo. My parents are very hesitant in letting me go, this is my first obstical in going. I have gone to many local concerts and festivals here in Maryland. But they don't like me driving far, and from here it is about 13 hours. I would be going with several friends. I just need some ideas and ways to convince them to let me go, any help from you guys would be appreciated. Any other general tips would also be helpful. Thanks!
Hello. Let me just say that I understand why parents might be hesitant to let their children go to Bonnaroo. You will be far away from home and on your own (or maybe with friends, but still without any adult supervision). It's a very hot environment, and they might not be entirely comfortable with the fact that they won't be able to contact you for several days. Also, there are lots of "unofficial vendors" selling certain products that your parents are probably worried about you purchasing, if you get my drift.
It's a parent's job to worry. Heck, I'm 21, and even I had a bit of trouble convincing my fairly lenient parents that it would be a good idea to send me to Bonnaroo this year. I can't tell you what to say or what not to say to convince them, because I don't know your parents at all, and I'm not sure of how they would react. There are no magic words you can utter that will automatically make them see everything from your point of view, unfortunately.
Going to a local concert for a few hours is one thing - spending four days in a field hundreds of miles from home is another. If you think Bonnaroo is going to be exactly like a series of various concerts for a few days straight, you are mistaken.
I understand that they wouldn't want you to be driving 700 miles without any adults in the car as well.
My tips for trying to convince them would be the following:
* Don't lie to them. They're not stupid, they know about some of the illicit things that go on at big music festivals. My advice would be to approach them about it first, before they approach you. If you completely deny the no no word aspect of Bonnaroo, they will not only know that you are lying, but they will feel as though there's been a breach of trust between you. How can they be expected to believe anything else you tell them if you can't be honest about any drukq use that may or may not take place on the farm? Just let them know that you're there for the music, not for the partying.
* Explain why you want to go to Bonnaroo so badly (and whatever you do, don't say "because it's the biggest party of the year"). When I was talking to my parents about why I wanted to go, I mentioned a few of the acts that I wanted to see. I told my mom that Robert Plant and Alison Krauss were going to be there, as well as Aimee Mann and BB King. By doing that, you can help your parents relate to you, and better understand why you want to go. It's for this very reason that I didn't say that Metallica, Kanye West and Gogol Bordello were going to be there (not that my parents would really care if they were there). See where I'm going with this?
* Tell them that it is actually a very safe and peaceful environment. Let her know that there are trained medical staff and police on hand 24/7, in case of any issues such as heat stroke or what-not.
* See if you can get someone who's a little bit older, more mature and more responsible to go along with you. An older brother or cousin, but someone they know and trust. This can make all the difference in the world.
*Consider taking a Greyhound Bus. Since you're still only 17, you probably have very little experience on the road, and they may be worried about you making a long trip with a car full of new drivers. There's a Greyhound station right in Manchester, only a couple miles from the farm.
* Tell them you intend to pay for everything with a summer job. Even if your family is well off and wouldn't notice the money, the fact that you'd be willing to work for your own little summer vacation shows them that not only are you responsible, but that you have a lot of character, and that you'll do whatever it takes to make it down there. Trust me, this goes a long way with parents.
I know that right now might seem like "the perfect time" to go, but really, Bonnaroo happens every year. If, after all this, they still say no, keep your composure. Don't break down in tears or lash out in anger, but accept their decision. Once again, this will help show them that you are mature and responsible. As long as you're living under their roof and they're paying all the bills, they make the rules.
Hey all! I have wanted to go to Bonnaroo ever since i was 15, and now this summer I will be 18 and graduated from high school so I feel like it is the perfect time for me to head down to the Roo. My parents are very hesitant in letting me go, this is my first obstical in going. I have gone to many local concerts and festivals here in Maryland. But they don't like me driving far, and from here it is about 13 hours. I would be going with several friends. I just need some ideas and ways to convince them to let me go, any help from you guys would be appreciated. Any other general tips would also be helpful. Thanks!
within reasonable bounds, assert your 18-year-oldness and tell your parents you're going. Just make sure you've got a good gameplan, the $$$ to pay for it yourself and enough confident comebacks for all your parents worried questions.
If you have clingy parents that worry about you dying or something, then have some sort of contact agreement. If not while on the farm (cell reception is spotty for people, but it was full bars for me), then keep them posted every few hours on your drive to Roo. I'm 23 and I still do that because I have an insanely clingy family. My AUNT cried when I went to San Francisco for three days a year and a half ago. I went to my first Roo when I was 20, so they were just as skeptical as if I was still a teenager. I basically just answered any questions they had about it and made sure I had a sound plan. I paid for everything myself and just went for it. They didn't seem to mind so much once they finally realized that I was old enough to do whatever I wanted with the money I earned. Your parents may just be having issues with the idea that you're growing up and all that jazz. They'll get over it. Besides, a trip to Cancun would probably cost you the same amount and the likelihood you'll die in Cancun is much greater than it is on the farm. I'm pretty sure there's a 99.9999999999999999999% guarantee you won't die while onsite (There are no 100% guarantees due to cosmic forces above and beyond ourselves, but I would totally bet on you surviving).
Show them you're actually serious about going and if they try to block your exit, then remind them that you're an adult and can do whatever the eff you want.
^Agreed. You'll be 18 and out of high school, sooooo you shouldn't need permission.
Doesn't always work like that. Maybe from a legal stand point but family cultures may be different. Would Bonnaroo be worth alienating parents, them not paying for school or just disrespect of their wishes. Maybe, maybe not point is that it is a lot more to some people then 18 and I am legal and free.
I'm 22 and my parents are actually glad that I'm going. They think it would be a cool experience, and don't want me to be old one day and regret not doing anything. And I even told them that I plan on getting my boobs painted. They know that I'm honest with them and that I'm not stupid. I think that if you're honest with your parents about everything and answer all their questions honestly then they'll trust you more. Tell them about what an awesome experience for you it will be and you don't want to have any regrets when you're older. Maybe you can find a bunch of articles on Bonnaroo about all the good things and have your parents read them so they can be more comfortable with you going. Any way you choose to convince them, good luck!
i love threads like this, they really make me appreciate my mom. the first time I went to roo was when I had just graduated also and the day before we left I was like "hey mom I'm going to this music festival in TN for the next couple days. i'll call u when I get there and when I leave" and her response was "have a great time".
Post by StreetBum87 on Oct 21, 2008 15:41:02 GMT -5
see im 21 and this year was my first...(had a blast) and i just basicly told my parents i was going......... but as been said....family cultures are different but i think jack324 summed it up perfectly
^Agreed. You'll be 18 and out of high school, sooooo you shouldn't need permission.
Doesn't always work like that. Maybe from a legal stand point but family cultures may be different. Would Bonnaroo be worth alienating parents, them not paying for school or just disrespect of their wishes. Maybe, maybe not point is that it is a lot more to some people then 18 and I am legal and free.
I guess I forget sometimes that other people aren't as independent from their parents as I was. Although we are a very tight knit family, I was pretty much financially independent of my parents the second I graduated high school (and all but room and board at 16), therefore they had no say in how I spent my own money and totally understood that. Although they weren't thrilled with some of the things I did (ie senior week, myrtle beach), they didn't object because they really couldn't.
If you are still dependent on them, maybe point out the fact you won't be for much longer. You'll be on your own soon, whether it's for college or just getting your first apartment, so they can't hold on to you forever. Use the whole "I need experiences like this to prepare me when I am on my own so that I don't fell thrust into the real world with no idea how to handle myself". Freedom little by little is usually a good ploy.
*i like coconuts, you can break them open they smell like ladies lyin in the sun** *Hell I don't even know where I am** *for now I must sit here and ponder the yonder: The herbivores did well cause their food didn't never run** *We listen, if it feels good We shake** *You made a big impression for a girl of your size, Now I can't get by without you and your big brown eyes.**
haha don't feel bad my friend is 20 and he had to beg from feb to june to go...Just be like mom dad I must go it will fulfill a life dream. Bonnaroo is serious business.
eh some parents really on their kids more than the kids do. My parents are emotional wrecks always acting out on my bro and I. Its like they're the teenagers and Im the adult sometimes cept they have the reigns. kinda blows at times. But I moving across the country soon FACK that ~
Plus when you reach a certain age you can do whatever you want regardless of what your parents think. If its your money take charge. if its not then ehhhhhhghh.....
My mom is usually the kind of parent that would say no and come up with a million different reasons I can't go, but I was pleasantly surprised when I asked her if I could go.
One of my friend told me about it at school, I was a senior in high school, and we decided to see if we could go. I went home that night, showed my mom the website and she was cool with it. She had concerns but I always had a good answer for her for different situations and showed her I was responsible by paying for it myself. Plus she knows I love music and if I wanted to go bad enough I'd find a way.
And that first year I was 18 and went with another 18 year old and a 17 year old and we were fine. We didn't have the perfect set up and forgot a couple of things but we made it comfortably the whole weekend. As long as you do your research and take advice from the people on here you should be fine.
Post by plasticpepper on Nov 9, 2008 16:23:40 GMT -5
My best advice is to be completely honest with your parents and also to sit down and talk with them about what worries them. It's not always the things you'd think.
In 2007 my best friend was flying across the country to come with me and two of my friends from school - I met her online and we'd only met in person once, and she didn't know my other friends at all. And she was 18 and my friends and I were 20. Amazingly, her parents were pretty cool with it and didn't take much convincing, but at first she hadn't mentioned the fact that my two friends were male. We were really worried that her parents wouldn't like the idea of her staying with two college guys she didn't even know, but when she did tell her parents they were actually somewhat relieved because they figured we'd be safer with some guys in the group. So, long story short, you can't always predict what will be the worrisome aspects for your parents.
Oh, and I have to disagree with the people who are saying that it doesn't matter what your parents think now that you're 18. If you're under their roof then it sure as hell matters, and even beyond that it matters if you want to maintain a good relationship with them. So I would very strongly recommend NOT getting all "whatever, I'm 18, I do what I want" with them.
A couple of thoughts from a mom - first, don't use the argument that you are 18 and can do whatever you want. Man, I hate when kids pull that one out; it's lame and immature. Best to have a healthy discussion along the lines that Jack324 mentioned. Also, remind your folks that it's not only young people who go to the farm. There are plenty of oldsters. Some of us do our best to help the kids have a safe time. I always carry extra sunscreen, water, bandaids to share and keep an eye out for kids that seem lost or have over-indulged. Finally, when your parents have given the green light - don't ruin it by being an ass at the festival. Pace yourself, sleep, take care of each other - that will make it easier for your folks to say okay in future years. Good luck and see you in June!
I'm 22 and my parents are actually glad that I'm going. They think it would be a cool experience, and don't want me to be old one day and regret not doing anything. And I even told them that I plan on getting my boobs painted. They know that I'm honest with them and that I'm not stupid. I think that if you're honest with your parents about everything and answer all their questions honestly then they'll trust you more. Tell them about what an awesome experience for you it will be and you don't want to have any regrets when you're older. Maybe you can find a bunch of articles on Bonnaroo about all the good things and have your parents read them so they can be more comfortable with you going. Any way you choose to convince them, good luck!
I'd be more than happy to assist you with the paint thing. ;D
A couple of thoughts from a mom - first, don't use the argument that you are 18 and can do whatever you want. Man, I hate when kids pull that one out; it's lame and immature. Best to have a healthy discussion along the lines that Jack324 mentioned. Also, remind your folks that it's not only young people who go to the farm. There are plenty of oldsters. Some of us do our best to help the kids have a safe time. I always carry extra sunscreen, water, bandaids to share and keep an eye out for kids that seem lost or have over-indulged. Finally, when your parents have given the green light - don't ruin it by being an ass at the festival. Pace yourself, sleep, take care of each other - that will make it easier for your folks to say okay in future years. Good luck and see you in June!
Karma to you!
I too am a mother of kids with one moved out of the house already.
My advice, if we (Parents) are still supporting you, and you need money, or the car etc, then you need to present a good business case! The pros and cons of such events. Also a mother knows if their kid would do well at a festie like this or others. I personally would want to take my two oldest, but my youngest teenage girl is a REAL challenge for me! I wouldn't trust her at Roo but my other two kids, for sure! BTW-I personally had no problems with my cell phone at all and mine is from Canada
My suggestion to you is maybe think about hooking your mother up with a Mom from this board to talk about Roo. I personally love bonnaroo and would most definitely take my kids. The experience is something that you will have close to your heart the rest of your life!
Post by squeaknasty on Dec 17, 2008 3:15:26 GMT -5
my mom was trying to convince me to buy one of the early tix! I think i am going to wait til the lineup comes out. REALLY hope there r some good bands. hope they have some sick headliners! i know if eagles of death metal r there, im 4 sure there. i know they aren't aheadliner but a bunch of my friends have seen them play and are all crazy about them now. they have been to 2 shows and now are trying to go a third. kind of jealous. CANT WAIT!
Post by jambandmusic on Jan 8, 2009 14:51:18 GMT -5
My parents are the exact same way with music festivals. Just have to try to convince them that you're 18 years old and pretty much a grown man. It's tough to do but since I convinced mine I'm sure you can convince yours. If you've stayed out of trouble mention how good of a kid you are
Go with someone else, who is older and whom they trust!
My parents were chill with me going to Bonnaroo this year (first year!!) with the stipulation that I go with somebody. Which makes sense, because I've never been to a festival before, so I wouldn't want to go alone. (Problem is, I'm having trouble finding someone to go with me)
But I'm basically in the same boat, been wanting to go since I was 15, now I'm graduating and I AM going.
Tell them you deserve a little vacation, a little fun time before you have to go to college, and start a life on your own. (then again, in America college tends to be more about fun times anyway )
)