Corrupt-a-Wish Foundation game

Granted, but terrible robot noises will wub wub wub you the Wong way
I wish I had a time machine so I could see um, then flylo

Granted you are a Poo-chi


I wish I had at least received my ticket shipping email by now

they do but the side effect is 94 hours of diarrhea.
I wish that I could spend a year and go to every festival that I wanted to, no money or vacation time worries.

Wish granted... but in the molecular destruction and re-construction that would be required for teleportation, your arms become your legs, your legs become your arms, and your head is sticking out of your chest. you are horribly deformed and will likely die from your "injuries"

I wish you were allowed to use a 4-wheeler at Roo

Granted, but it's got nothing in it.

I wish the Flyers had beat the Devils in the playoffs...

ugh... Philly phans? Nice? does not compute.

Wish granted... but they only hold one concert a day for the whole week.

I wish I was at Bonnaroo already, chilling with a nice cold brewski

Granted... fast forward the next three weeks as well. you miss bonnaroo

Wish Granted... They play Jerry Was A Race Car Driver over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over. Enjoy.

I wish I was at the meetup already...

Granted. 2 hour drive but you are out of gas.
I wish it would rain a little.

Granted. I have the best luck in the world, however I draw this luck from those around me so as we are all on the way to roo all of their vehicles brake down because all of their luck is now gone.

I wish that Unchained played a four hour set instead of just two

Granted! You now live in the Sahara and have an average day over 100 degrees.

I wish I could play the guitar better

Granted. At the very moment you gain access, a massive solar flare from the sun hits and overpowers the Earth's magnetosphere, frying all the satellites and electronic equipment worldwide, rendering you penniless.
I wish for nothing.

Granted, your car broke down and you have to walk instead.

I wish my work computer would run faster.

granted but every bottle you buy is spoiled

I wish I knew how to work damn message boards.