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I did not wait in line for portos this year. I don't care if you think this is a dick move. It kind of is, but here's why I do it anyway.
Every single flipping time there was a huge line out of a trailer of portos, there were open and unused portos in the back of the trailer being ignored by everyone in line. I'm not going to wait in line with people who aren't paying attention to the world around them just to be politely stupid.
So, yes, I was a line jumper. Every single time. I'm not ashamed. Get smart people. Don't be a sheep. Think outside the crowd mentality.
Post by Lawn Gnome on Jun 12, 2012 10:52:43 GMT -5
This isn't really line jumping. I did the same thing. The benefit of having more and more noobs at each 'Roo is that they succumb, quite easily, to the herd mentality. They assume that if there is a line leading into the portos, then that must be where they need to wait. Remember kids, just because there is A line, doesn't mean it is THE line.
i agree... I mean, i can understand multiple lines when it's super crowded, but there is no reason to have ONE giant line. There is no way one person can see all of the unused stalls. On top of that, everyone in the line has to wait for the person to walk all the way over to the stall. Completely ridiculous!
Same with the mile long line to get into centeroo. Do people at the end of the line not realize there are thousands of people are walking right in? I've never seen that until this year!
Post by funkybuttlovin on Jun 12, 2012 10:57:31 GMT -5
There were lines everywhere but none in front of the Porto. So I cut in as well when people got pissed I'd say that it's been open for 5 mins and you all are standing here.
It was strange people love standing in lines. I took a pic with a use dressed up as Waldo next thing I know thirty people have formed a line to do the same thing. At the portos I skipped too since there were so many open every time. People wasting time in lines.....
Post by thesidebar on Jun 12, 2012 11:34:42 GMT -5
YUP.. the back ones are most always empty.. I know the ones right beside This Tent were always full, but there was another group of them like 50 yards further back. those were always walk up and serve.
also, as a male, I did appreciate the Urinal ones between Which and What. always WAY WAY faster than the regular ones. too bad they were SUPER SUPER nazty saturday night...
Post by 3post1jack1 on Jun 12, 2012 11:39:40 GMT -5
agreed, don't feel bad, I didn't wait in line either at said portapotties. its important to utilize full capacity, by doing so you are actually helping those waiting in line.
I used these awesome portable urinals as well that I got on amazon. i was on the rail for Phish the whole show and peed twice using the portable urinals. didn't spill a drop and no one saw my penis.
Post by Lawn Gnome on Jun 12, 2012 11:50:29 GMT -5
Of course, if you're a male (or a really laid back female) you should never even wait for a porto after dusk. Of all the walls I've ever peed on, the one at the back of the What Stage was definitely one of them.
Post by Claytonator on Jun 12, 2012 12:36:25 GMT -5
Does anyone know what was so special about the portopotties behind This Tent? Each toilet had its own individual line, not just one massive line for all of them.
That was the only place this phenomenon happened, and I noticed it every day.
Post by itrainmonkeys on Jun 12, 2012 12:54:10 GMT -5
People form lines because they are like sheep. Those porto johns with the shade things are arranged in a way so that there are multiple entrances and you just go up and look for an open one. I never really waited for a portopotty unless in the campgrounds in the morning.
Post by iwannagonow on Jun 12, 2012 14:08:08 GMT -5
In 2011 during LN you had to use the wall because it was too dark to see inside the PJ's. It was actually hilarious seeing everyone, male and female doing this and not giving a sh*t.
Post by cory's beard on Jun 12, 2012 14:12:52 GMT -5
I never noticed Any line at the portos behind This Tent. They were so far away from everything else going on. And they seemed to be less frequently used and always clean. If I ever had to poop in Centeroo, that'd be where I go.
In 2011 during LN you had to use the wall because it was too dark to see inside the PJ's. It was actually hilarious seeing everyone, male and female doing this and not giving a sh*t.
lol you didn't have to use the wall. It was just easier. Pretty much every portapotty i've been in has the same setup. If you're a guy it's pretty much straight ahead. For girls....that's another story. I can't imagine what it's like for them at night lol
Problem was, although I had practiced and felt confident in aiming my stream away from myself, I did not practice getting used to the sensation of peeing while standing up, wearing clothes and surrounded by people. I wasn't anticipating having trouble getting the stream started. It worked great when I was relaxed enough to get it going though!
Next year I will be sure to have perfected the art of peeing like a dude.
Best thing was the look the security guy searching my bag gave me when I told him what it was.
Post by EthnicallyCrimean98476 on Jun 12, 2012 15:07:44 GMT -5
As long as we're talking porto strategies, I'll add this. I used about half a good-sized bottle of hand sanitizer by myself this weekend. I would wipe down the Porto's seat, door handle, and anything else I was going to touch before doing anything. It's a bit tedious, but definitely worth it.
I noticed this same type of thing happening at one of the spicy pie stands. There were 3 lines at the stand: one line with like 50 people, and two lines with about 3 people each.
Post by railroad436 on Jun 12, 2012 15:59:45 GMT -5
This was my first 'Roo and I figured this out on Thursday afternoon. The only time the portos were being used and line was necessary was during a busy set at the What Stage.
Regarding the bathroom, WTF do people do in those things? I have been to several festivals and I have never, ever seen the kind of things I saw in those portos. My god, why do people piss and shit on the floor? Cans and all kinds of trash everywhere covered in piss and shit. I dropped some things in the portos a couple of times and just left them there because I wasnt about to touch anything that had touched that floor.
Turtles are, actually quite sexy, if you think about it. I’m getting an erection just thinking about turtles. No, not a stripper named turtles, that’s not funny. Actual turtles.
—?Thom Yorke
That's not line jumping, I did that too. Every time, I was surprised no one ever got out of line to form a second line after seeing me do it. Also, I think it's pretty nasty that guys piss on the wall by What but at the same time I was like yeah! Don't get in this line in front of me and make it longer! Heh heh. Maybe they should put some troughs there or somewhere,like they have in the dudes bathrooms at wrigley field (so I hear)...
Problem was, although I had practiced and felt confident in aiming my stream away from myself, I did not practice getting used to the sensation of peeing while standing up, wearing clothes and surrounded by people. I wasn't anticipating having trouble getting the stream started. It worked great when I was relaxed enough to get it going though!
Next year I will be sure to have perfected the art of peeing like a dude.
Best thing was the look the security guy searching my bag gave me when I told him what it was.
My problem with the pstyle was that by the time I fot the potty, I had to go so bad my stream was too "forceful" and w0ould splash back on me...good thing I figured out the other secret of checking the back/last porta potties!!
11/29: Judas Priest 12/31: Cake 2/4: Tool 4/21: Van Halen 5/17: Styx, REO Speedwagon, Ted Nugent 6/7-6/10: Bonnaroo 6/11: Yankess vs Braves 6/21: Iron Maiden 7/10: Roger Waters
Post by Od Lid Johnny on Jun 12, 2012 22:26:53 GMT -5
I learned this strategy last year. After doing so, I would always walk to someone close to the end of the line and tell them the secret.
I also showed my sister this method for the line in centeroo.
I do have to admit that I also used this method for the Pit at the What stage. I would simply casually hang by the entrance an watch for the squish and hop right at the end of the rail. Once you get surrounded you are in.
Post by SwiggitySwoodyComin4DatBooty on Jun 12, 2012 22:32:56 GMT -5
Hah, I love this because right after phantogram thurday night there was a MASSIVE line in the nearest portopotty area. I did the exact same thing and just kinda went walking around it and looked around and sure enough there were open ones in the back. As I was walking away some people in the line actually got out of line and I overheard one of them say "dude, quack this that line is too quacking long..lets try somewhere else." herp derp
Post by itrainmonkeys on Jun 13, 2012 0:19:43 GMT -5
When you are in the campsites or at one of the few areas where the portapotties are just in a straight row, with a line formed in front of each one....that's when you know that you can't just cut ahead and use the first open one.
If there are multiple entrances to an area that has many unused portapotties then feel free to walk in any of the entrances and find an unoccupied john.
I do have to admit that I also used this method for the Pit at the What stage. I would simply casually hang by the entrance an watch for the squish and hop right at the end of the rail. Once you get surrounded you are in.
I do have to admit that I also used this method for the Pit at the What stage. I would simply casually hang by the entrance an watch for the squish and hop right at the end of the rail. Once you get surrounded you are in.
Oh, it's that guy.
Yep, that guy who bought a ticket to watch shows. Not stand in line. Don't worry I'm not a pusher.
And we all know that is how pits work. No need for jealousy in the fact that you don't know how to adapt to a situation.
