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Post by Jake Jortles on Jun 11, 2020 11:04:29 GMT -5
Zombies incoming again! We did two separate drafts, so vote in both.
It's like a videogame where they start of coming at you slow. You could probably run around and survive yourself through the first couple rounds. Then the difficulty slowly ramps up until at some point it is impossible to survive. If you got to have 4 individual animals to protect you to the best of their physical abilities, which of the following squads do you believe you would last the longest with? Choose three.
1. The animals know they are fighting for you and are assumed to be prepared to do so to the best of their physical abilities.
2. This is only one of each animal.
This is for seeding. I'm sorry that this will drag out a bit, but I want to see the hilarity that comes from potential debates during 1v1 matchups. The most voted for lineup will have a bye. Use all three of your votes you fucking assholes.
If you are voting but did not follow along in the thread, I highly recommend browsing it for entertainment value.
Let's introduce the teams from Draft 2.
Silver Surfer Team: Dolphin, Honeybadger, Rat, Tortoise
My first stop is by my old spot in the heights. There was a big ass racoon who flashed teeth at me a couple times, got in my trash, would stop at my grill looking for scraps when i was cooking, could scale a house in seconds. Scoop him El Bandito and head to the zoo.
At the Zoo we head first to Houston's world class gorilla exhibit. I once saw one of the gorillas cashed out legs spread eagle in a rock groove, definitely a chiller who fights for his right to party. He joins the team. Over in the Safari section we pick up Ozzy Ostrich. Stand-Up Squad almost complete.
On our way to Austin (to take advantage of the network of lakes and rivers, and a highway system sure to confuse even the most capable zombies) we resuce a Joey from one of those awful wildlife hunting farms in Texas.
[Tracking shot of all of our legs walking. Camera pans out, POWER SHOT the five of us standing up]
We find a nice house of the lake with good exit paths (ideally one w/ a garden). While we wait for the zombies bandito (while riding ozzy) join me in searching for supplies while Joey and Zoe hold down the fort. Once we're set, time to hit the lake and relax. Ozzy and Zoe can't swim, but Zoe hangs on the bank and Ozzy chills on the back porch low key scouting.
Once relaxed, fortification begins. A normal height fence shouldnt be much of a problem for the team (try getting a hippo over a five footer), so first we fence in. We send El Bandito into the trees to forage/scout. We don't block the roads entirely, but we build a barricade for Ozzy to sit out front and watch the road.
Single/low number waves don't stand a chance. Hand to hand combat we're roasting.
Large waves, we may have a little trouble, but if we can get a good bottle neck, the Big 3 can probably hold it down while me and ELB get a head start on the escape, grabbing whatever our hands can carry. Big 3 all fast enough to get out of harms way and catch back up.
if we can find a shallow enough point along the rivers we can all get across, hills no problem, should not have a ton of issues w/ long distance walking. we'll have to avoid too steep of mountains, but we probably don't get that far east/west anyway.
Kangaroo kick to the midsection > Gorilla haymaker > Ostrich talon kick > Racoon dancing on the graves of all those foolish enough to challenge The Stand Up Squad