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When I was little(7 maybe?) there was this feild trip we took to a park where I went into the bathroom there and took a crap in the urinal, and this old guy came in while I was just sitting there legs swinging, even weirder was that the old guy just leaned up against the wall and waited, plus i hadta get up and run to the next stall to get the toilet paper....to this day i still don't know why I decided to do that.
Post by suitcasemurphy on Mar 23, 2007 1:35:16 GMT -5
I once pooped myself trying on pants at an american eagle I was in high school, and wasn't feeling all that good to begin with, When I went to pass gas...a little extra came!
I took off my boxers, stuff them in the "new" pants I was trying on and put them back on the rack! I can't even imagine the horror that poor girl or guy (wearing headset) said when they grabbed those bad boys out!
Post by oatmealschnappz on Mar 23, 2007 3:45:26 GMT -5
The funniest thing was the fact that, all night I had the recurring "catch-phrase, inside-joke, sound-byte" loop thing going on.....as I know you are all familiar with. Originally it had refered to remote-controls, lighters, glow-sticks and such but, after the earlier-mentioned incident, it became like a wierd psychedelic premonition. In short: "I've got too much sh*t in my hands!" will always have a very special and disturbing meaning for me! Him too! "YOU'VE got too much sh*t in your hands!" were the last words spoken between us for quite a while. Can I get a "GODD*MN!"?
Last Edit: Mar 23, 2007 3:57:31 GMT -5 by oatmealschnappz - Back to Top
A very dark and disturbing secret that I have, is that when I was in 6th grade (for the first time) I got into a friend of mine, like a fist fight, I think there were 3 fights between us throughout the school day (one in history class, one in the art class bathrooms, and one outside the school). I basically won, and was proud, because he was allot bigger than I and was kind of a bully to some people. But we were usually cool and sometimes sat together and talked at lunch. So me being a frustrated child, started to brag about "whooping Shawn's ass." I was a prick about it for sure. That was 1997, and in 2003, on December 13, the kid gets into a drunk driving accident and dies. The day he died was my birthday.
Post by oatmealschnappz on Mar 23, 2007 4:11:09 GMT -5
Damn! That's rough! But that's the kind of sh*t that happens. It's not your fault, so don't dwell on it too much. We all feel guilty about all kinds of stuff....and most was unforseeable and unpreventable. Life always finds a way to circle back around and sucker-punch us. You just can't let it knock you down. I know, easier said than done but.....
(Here's a little bit of karma for you)
Last Edit: Mar 23, 2007 4:13:53 GMT -5 by oatmealschnappz - Back to Top
Thanks, much appreciated. I just found that to be too bizzare. I don't dwell on it too much though, it just is even crazier since I was born Friday the 13th and my sister's daughter was born at 9:11 am on 9-11-02. Is there just a bad luck gene in my family?!? lol
My story is similar. In high school, I got in a fight with this guy that started as one-on-one before all his friends joined in and kicked my @ss. Shortly there after he drove head-on in to a school bus (accidentally) on the way to school and died. My secret, I didn't feel bad about it and never did even though he was a good friend of a girl I was seeing. I thought he was a bad person (mistreated his mother) and so I never felt bad. I don't know if that has made me cold or not.
most of us have been there. ive found its like a band aid. its best to just rip it off quickly. sure it hurts like hell. but only for a bit. then its done and you move on. and after a bit ive found im much happier on my own with no one to answer to and noone to get upset about. there is plenty off goodtimes and fun to be had without having a serious relationship with all the drama that comes with it. once it gets dramatic its not fun.. i just walk away at that point. gotta keepo it fun. life is too depressing if your not having fun!
Post by ziggyandthemonkeys on Mar 23, 2007 21:14:13 GMT -5
I feel very strongly that laws should be enforced, and would be happy to take it upon myself to do so. I dont care about smokin weed and stuff, im not gonna be a dick like some cops. A lot of cops are actually pretty cool though.
I once took a dump in a paper cup and dumped it on a rock on the scenic trail on Stone Mountain in Georgia...and then I hung around and waited for people to walk by and see it...including a park ranger saying it must have been a helluva bear.
By the way...this was in like 9th grade...not recently.
there are different areas of law enforcement. anti-terrorism seems a noble profession to me. dea, not so much. making detective and working rape, murder, kidnapping is great too. vice, not so much. but to each thier own. and if i get harrassed in c-bus im asking to speak with officer ziggy ;D
Post by poopzilla33 on Mar 23, 2007 21:26:31 GMT -5
ziggyandthemonkeys said:
I feel very strongly that laws should be enforced, and would be happy to take it upon myself to do so. I dont care about smokin weed and stuff, im not gonna be a thingy like some cops. A lot of cops are actually pretty cool though.
a former neighbor called the cops on us all the time for no reason other then he was a prick. so when we moved we stuck poo under his car door handles. and a nasty one in his grill. but i dont feel bad about. in fact i think i might drive by and do it again
Post by spookymonster on Mar 23, 2007 22:10:05 GMT -5
I get along fine with all my neighbors, except one. She's genuinely crazy, and she calls the cops on me all the time for things like parking in front of her house or (the most recent time) flipping her the bird (after she told me to go f*ck myself for pulling into my driveway). Ever since i moved here, she can't help but throw up her windows when I pass and start yelling at me - "Goddamn c*cksucker!" or some other colorful epithet. I can ignore it for the most part, but when I've got family over (I'm part Puerto Rican), she can't help but shout out "get out of my town, you filthy spics!". She even throws out the N-word when she thinks no one else in the neighborhood can hear. I never call the cops, and they all sympathize with me, but they also say they can't really do anything. The only thing I can really do is file a complaint, but what's that gonna do? So, I find other ways to amuse myself 'til she dies (she's over 80):
I throw her newspapers onto her roof.
I pour weed killer on the fence line separating our properties: it's keeps my tarmac clear from weeds, but her azailias and lilac bush didn't tolerate it as well.
I make a point to use my snow blower to clean off my property and the property of all her adjacent neighbors - but not hers. I aim the blower so the snow piles up on her front lawn (never her walkway or stairs, however; I'm not that heartless).
I used to tell friends to park in front of her house if my driveway was full. She somehow thought that spot was private property. In one of the last civil discussions I had with her, I told her she should get it turned into a handicap spot, so no one but her could park there. Years later, she finally did that. However, I have a handicap permit I used to use to drive my blind grandmother around with, so whenever she cheeses me off, I flick it on and pull into her spot.
When she dies, I'm going to find out where she's buried and... well.... lets just say I'll be sharing a beer with her; mine will be cold, and hers will be warm....
Post by oatmealschnappz on Mar 24, 2007 0:14:54 GMT -5
My friend Billy and I shared the same birthday, so every year we would get together and have a celebration(Nov 21). One year, after picking him up, buying the tequila and hanging out at this abandoned concrete facory(our standard place), he started acting REALLY drunk. We decided to drive him home and let him sleep it off. The next day, we found out that he had went to bed and choked on his own vomit and died. I've always felt incredibly bad and possibly responsible for what happened....or at least how it happened. If any of many things had been handled even slightly differently, he might still be alive. We just knid of "dumped" him at his house after he became too much to handle. That's the kind of sh*t you don't forget. His family still posts an article about how great he was and how much they miss him in the local (Knoxville) paper on his/our birthday. Even though (or maybe because) we weren't actually close friends aside of the birthday thing, I still feel like I should have seen the "signs" and somehow stopped it from happening. I don't know if I even could've, but I fel like I should've known to try. The worst and most disturbing part of the story is that Billy's dad (who allowed him to smoke in the house) evidentally woke-up to go to the bathroom while it was happening. According to Billy's sister...His dad heard a "gurgling" noise (from Billy's bedroom), thought that Billy was smoking from his water-pipe, p*ssed and went back to sleep....While his son choked to death. I hate myself for EVERYTHING that happened that night! I will NEVER be able to imagine how his dad feels. Sometimes i've felt like I should apologize or try to atone for my part in Billy's death but, sometimes I convince myself that it was unavoidable. Either way, I'm too much of a coward to ever fully face the reality of what happened. I didn't even have the balls to go to his funeral.
Last Edit: Mar 24, 2007 0:17:21 GMT -5 by oatmealschnappz - Back to Top
wow man.. thats horrible. obviously your not at fault. you didnt force him to drink so much. and there was no way for you to know. same for his dad. no way of knowing. but i cant imagine living with that as a father. or a friend for that matter. damn thats sad. but hey if anything by mentioning it where hundereds of people who like to party will read it maybe it will help someone else. i know i will pay more attention to overly drunk friends that passout.
Last Edit: Mar 24, 2007 0:41:17 GMT -5 by Dude - Back to Top
I'm pretty sure that at this point of our relationship my boyfriend and I are only together cuz it's just convenient...I'm using him for a place to stay often and he uses me for sex.
Another "secret" though, after reading through all these posts I'm happy that I haven't even gone through half the crap that some of you have. That takes a lot of balls and if I could give one massive karma to everyone I would
Post by billypilgrim on Mar 24, 2007 12:54:12 GMT -5
billypilgrim said:
I watch hidden-camera underage midget animal snuff film porn. And the OC.
Since everyone else is opening up, I think I should be more open, too.
I watch hidden-camera underage gay multiracial midget animal snuff film porn while sitting in a large tub of mayonaise with sushi (toro, sake, or hamachi, never unagi or ebi) between my toes. And sometimes I watch prior seasons of the OC on DVD.
(Not trying to belittle the serious traumas laid out above. I just thought the thread -- like most things in life -- needed some humor.)
i have been pissed on by a rhino. and not just a tiny bit. more like soaked.
when i was 15 i volunteered at the zoo in lansing and one day i was cleaning the moat around the rhino display. well i dont know if youve seen a rhino piss but it just fires out the back like a friggin fire hose. and that thing targeted me. it actually followed me as i ran and got me more. damn rhino!! it was not very pleasent.
j/k (kinda)
