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I'll edit this with details in the morning, but today was a great day. It was a date.
edit. First of all, I appreciate all the folowups, advice, and notes about what was going on. I probably should have seen the signs that it was romantic, but you can never be too sure; I didn't want to be seemingly presumptuous. So, although many of you assumed that we were hanging out on a Friday night, considering the nature of my job and that conventional weekends aren't a thing that I get to experience, we met at 1pm. The place we went to is a combination bar/restaurant/bowling alley/theater (Bryant Lake Bowl, for the MPLS folks). Almost right off the bat of her showing up, we were off to the conversational races. We chatted about a very wide variety of things over those four hours: Palahniuk, Earl Sweatshirt, male singers that sound like women, buffalo, carrying around live rabbits, clumsiness, John Mulaney, "dopeness", stealing restaurants' framed first bills, puberty, lazy robbers, Kafka, bike helmets, etc, etc. You know, first date subjects. In the middle of all this we ate, we drank, we bowled (and then promptly washed out hands because you're right, bowling balls are fuckin' gnarly), we kept chatting. We went on like that almost nonstop for a little over four hours. I ran into some friends who were just finished with rehearsing their show, I ran into another dear friend of mine outside too as we were leaving. Apparently a friend of hers was visiting from Kentucky, so I walked her across the street to meet her ride before I left to ride to work. As we were waiting for the crosswalk to tell us how to live our lives, I interrupted our conversation. I asked her if we just went on a date. She sort of giggle-grunted (I don't have the vocabulary to explain noises, leave me alone) and sort of said, "uhhhah." I immediately interrupted because the way she was looking at me could only lead to positive outcomes and said, "because I'd really like if it were." She said, "Oh god, then yes, please," and I then did the celebratory motion of golfers and every other professional athlete who is excited and alone and clenched my fist and did that partial knee-bending, "Yuss." It was playful and probably a little strange from the perspective of waiting cars, but I stand by my uninhibited excitement. Apparently she was in a brief relationship with the guy at that bar, but it didn't last, so I wasn't entirely mistaken.
I invited her to an opening night party at the Guthrie next Friday, which should prove to be all kinds of interesting. I'm gonna try to meet up with her before then because yesterday was just too good of a day to wait another week.
snowman funny enough, there was actually a point during the conversation pre-bowling where she asked who our Donny was going to be. I suggested we pick a random bowler and occasionally remind them that they're out of their element.
So I joined a kickball league with the director of my department and a few other people who work in my company. I did it for networking, but also because I like sports and I wanted to meet some new people. Also, as with everything else in my life, I hoped it would be a way to meet some new women.
We had our first game yesterday and actually won, which was pretty cool. After the games each week, everyone goes to this local bar and plays drinking games. The drinking games are also scored and it effects your overall team rankings in the league. The best part is that its a free keg every week.
After playing some different games and getting to know my team members, I see a girl that I think is cute playing beer pong with some of her teammates. I go stand by them and watch, first talking with her pong partner who was the umpire of our game. After a few minutes of that, she introduces herself to me and we start talking. She also happens to work with my company as a night nurse at our main hospital, so this was a great ice breaker.
So we end up spending the next roughly two hours together, playing more games, drinking, talking, and flirting. I eventually get around to asking her if she had a boyfriend and when she thankfully said no, I asked her out. We exchanged numbers and plan on going out together tomorrow.
Everybody at this thing was wearing their kickball jerseys and were still dirty and whatnot. She had her hair in a ponytail and wasn't wearing a lot of makeup, but she was seriously cute. She is short and looked like a combination of Anne Hathaway and Alanna Masterson. But beyond that, she was very positive, had a good sense of humor, killed me every time at flip cup, could drink some beer, played soccer in high school, and was a lot of fun. I left thinking that I was very happy and excited to see her again.
When we were at the bar, I found her on Facebook because I was "jokingly" saying I was going to stalk her later and because she had a pretty common name she doubted I could find her. I found her easily. Let me tell you, she is drop dead gorgeous. I mean smoking. I would date her in a heartbeat with her ponytail and all, but when she dresses up? Holy guacamole.
I haven't crushed this hard in a minute, so I'm afraid I'm going to screw this up. Dating app date? Never a problem. This is making me for reals nervous. I got for reals feels.
So I joined a kickball league with the director of my department and a few other people who work in my company. I did it for networking, but also because I like sports and I wanted to meet some new people. Also, as with everything else in my life, I hoped it would be a way to meet some new women.
We had our first game yesterday and actually won, which was pretty cool. After the games each week, everyone goes to this local bar and plays drinking games. The drinking games are also scored and it effects your overall team rankings in the league. The best part is that its a free keg every week.
After playing some different games and getting to know my team members, I see a girl that I think is cute playing beer pong with some of her teammates. I go stand by them and watch, first talking with her pong partner who was the umpire of our game. After a few minutes of that, she introduces herself to me and we start talking. She also happens to work with my company as a night nurse at our main hospital, so this was a great ice breaker.
So we end up spending the next roughly two hours together, playing more games, drinking, talking, and flirting. I eventually get around to asking her if she had a boyfriend and when she thankfully said no, I asked her out. We exchanged numbers and plan on going out together tomorrow.
Everybody at this thing was wearing their kickball jerseys and were still dirty and whatnot. She had her hair in a ponytail and wasn't wearing a lot of makeup, but she was seriously cute. She is short and looked like a combination of Anne Hathaway and Alanna Masterson. But beyond that, she was very positive, had a good sense of humor, killed me every time at flip cup, could drink some beer, played soccer in high school, and was a lot of fun. I left thinking that I was very happy and excited to see her again.
When we were at the bar, I found her on Facebook because I was "jokingly" saying I was going to stalk her later and because she had a pretty common name she doubted I could find her. I found her easily. Let me tell you, she is drop dead gorgeous. I mean smoking. I would date her in a heartbeat with her ponytail and all, but when she dresses up? Holy guacamole.
I haven't crushed this hard in a minute, so I'm afraid I'm going to screw this up. Dating app date? Never a problem. This is making me for reals nervous. I got for reals feels.
And I literally got "rain checked" on the date tomorrow five minutes after writing this. She thought she would be done with a crawfish boil in the late afternoon, but apparently it doesn't start until the late afternoon. Ugggggghhhhh
So I joined a kickball league with the director of my department and a few other people who work in my company. I did it for networking, but also because I like sports and I wanted to meet some new people. Also, as with everything else in my life, I hoped it would be a way to meet some new women.
We had our first game yesterday and actually won, which was pretty cool. After the games each week, everyone goes to this local bar and plays drinking games. The drinking games are also scored and it effects your overall team rankings in the league. The best part is that its a free keg every week.
After playing some different games and getting to know my team members, I see a girl that I think is cute playing beer pong with some of her teammates. I go stand by them and watch, first talking with her pong partner who was the umpire of our game. After a few minutes of that, she introduces herself to me and we start talking. She also happens to work with my company as a night nurse at our main hospital, so this was a great ice breaker.
So we end up spending the next roughly two hours together, playing more games, drinking, talking, and flirting. I eventually get around to asking her if she had a boyfriend and when she thankfully said no, I asked her out. We exchanged numbers and plan on going out together tomorrow.
Everybody at this thing was wearing their kickball jerseys and were still dirty and whatnot. She had her hair in a ponytail and wasn't wearing a lot of makeup, but she was seriously cute. She is short and looked like a combination of Anne Hathaway and Alanna Masterson. But beyond that, she was very positive, had a good sense of humor, killed me every time at flip cup, could drink some beer, played soccer in high school, and was a lot of fun. I left thinking that I was very happy and excited to see her again.
When we were at the bar, I found her on Facebook because I was "jokingly" saying I was going to stalk her later and because she had a pretty common name she doubted I could find her. I found her easily. Let me tell you, she is drop dead gorgeous. I mean smoking. I would date her in a heartbeat with her ponytail and all, but when she dresses up? Holy guacamole.
I haven't crushed this hard in a minute, so I'm afraid I'm going to screw this up. Dating app date? Never a problem. This is making me for reals nervous. I got for reals feels.
This is hilarious to me because I've recently joined a kickball league as well. And we all drink at a designated bar afterwards. I actually double checked your location to make sure you didn't live in Jacksonville from the way you described it.
I understand what you're saying about fucking up with girls that matter but being invincible with girls that don't. I have had that problem in the past, and I've been lectured and told that I should treat the ones that matter the same way I'd treat the ones that don't. It makes sense and is so obvious, but its hard to do.
So I joined a kickball league with the director of my department and a few other people who work in my company. I did it for networking, but also because I like sports and I wanted to meet some new people. Also, as with everything else in my life, I hoped it would be a way to meet some new women.
We had our first game yesterday and actually won, which was pretty cool. After the games each week, everyone goes to this local bar and plays drinking games. The drinking games are also scored and it effects your overall team rankings in the league. The best part is that its a free keg every week.
After playing some different games and getting to know my team members, I see a girl that I think is cute playing beer pong with some of her teammates. I go stand by them and watch, first talking with her pong partner who was the umpire of our game. After a few minutes of that, she introduces herself to me and we start talking. She also happens to work with my company as a night nurse at our main hospital, so this was a great ice breaker.
So we end up spending the next roughly two hours together, playing more games, drinking, talking, and flirting. I eventually get around to asking her if she had a boyfriend and when she thankfully said no, I asked her out. We exchanged numbers and plan on going out together tomorrow.
Everybody at this thing was wearing their kickball jerseys and were still dirty and whatnot. She had her hair in a ponytail and wasn't wearing a lot of makeup, but she was seriously cute. She is short and looked like a combination of Anne Hathaway and Alanna Masterson. But beyond that, she was very positive, had a good sense of humor, killed me every time at flip cup, could drink some beer, played soccer in high school, and was a lot of fun. I left thinking that I was very happy and excited to see her again.
When we were at the bar, I found her on Facebook because I was "jokingly" saying I was going to stalk her later and because she had a pretty common name she doubted I could find her. I found her easily. Let me tell you, she is drop dead gorgeous. I mean smoking. I would date her in a heartbeat with her ponytail and all, but when she dresses up? Holy guacamole.
I haven't crushed this hard in a minute, so I'm afraid I'm going to screw this up. Dating app date? Never a problem. This is making me for reals nervous. I got for reals feels.
This is hilarious to me because I've recently joined a kickball league as well. And we all drink at a designated bar afterwards. I actually double checked your location to make sure you didn't live in Jacksonville from the way you described it.
I understand what you're saying about fucking up with girls that matter but being invincible with girls that don't. I have had that problem in the past, and I've been lectured and told that I should treat the ones that matter the same way I'd treat the ones that don't. It makes sense and is so obvious, but its hard to do.
Yes! This exactly. And I am seriously bummed right now over being rain-checked. I mean, she did tell me yesterday that she had plans earlier in the day but should be done by the night, but I guess she misunderstood when that started. So the excuse checks out if it's true. But for my tastes, this girl is a perfect 10. I feel like tomorrow was my chance to fully grab her attention. She may meet someone else tomorrow or at Jazz Fest Sunday, or just lose interest altogether. I never have these thoughts about girls I'm only partially interested in. Maybe this is why I don't ever let myself catch feels.
Yes! This exactly. And I am seriously bummed right now over being rain-checked. I mean, she did tell me yesterday that she had plans earlier in the day but should be done by the night, but I guess she misunderstood when that started. So the excuse checks out if it's true. But for my tastes, this girl is a perfect 10. I feel like tomorrow was my chance to fully grab her attention. She may meet someone else tomorrow or at Jazz Fest Sunday, or just lose interest altogether. I never have these thoughts about girls I'm only partially interested in. Maybe this is why I don't ever let myself catch feels.
First of all, be careful throwing around a 10 like that. Really cheapens your scale in my eyes. IDC how hot she is, a 10 is something you have the pleasure of seeing once a year in public.
Second, isn't it funny that just a week or two ago you were worried that'd you weren't capable of catching feelings anymore?
Post by crazykittensmile on Apr 22, 2016 17:46:51 GMT -5
My feminist alarm bells are going nuts right now. Can't you just say a girl is really fucking cool and you also like looking at her? I don't understand the need to apply a grading scale to someone's looks.
I'm happy for you jakicker , I just hope she never hears about her grade lol, even if it's an A++
My feminist alarm bells are going nuts right now. Can't you just say a girl is really fucking cool and you also like looking at her? I don't understand the need to apply a grading scale to someone's looks.
I'm happy for you jakicker , I just hope she never hears about her grade lol, even if it's an A++
I'm sure she would be absolutely disgusted to know how beautiful he finds her to be physically.
My feminist alarm bells are going nuts right now. Can't you just say a girl is really fucking cool and you also like looking at her? I don't understand the need to apply a grading scale to someone's looks.
I'm happy for you jakicker , I just hope she never hears about her grade lol, even if it's an A++
I'm sure she would be absolutely disgusted to know how beautiful he finds her to be physically.
You'd be surprised with how many ladies aren't fully comfortable with objectification.
Believe it or not there's a difference between telling a woman you think she's beautiful and telling her where she rests on a scale of hotness.
My feminist alarm bells are going nuts right now. Can't you just say a girl is really fucking cool and you also like looking at her? I don't understand the need to apply a grading scale to someone's looks.
I'm happy for you jakicker , I just hope she never hears about her grade lol, even if it's an A++
I'm sure she would be absolutely disgusted to know how beautiful he finds her to be physically.
This is the excuse guys use when women complain about cat-calling.
I'm sure she would be absolutely disgusted to know how beautiful he finds her to be physically.
You'd be surprised with how many ladies aren't fully comfortable with objectification.
Believe it or not there's a difference between telling a woman you think she's beautiful and telling her where she rests on a scale of hotness.
I'm quite aware. I wouldn't expect jaikicker to randomly say to this girl, "Hey I think you are a 9.45 out of 10 when I consider level of urgency with which I hope to see you naked in relation to the rest of the female population."
Simply comparing one girls looks to another is completely natural, and I'm struggling to see how its unethical at all.
I'm sure she would be absolutely disgusted to know how beautiful he finds her to be physically.
This is the excuse guys use when women complain about cat-calling.
Right, but since I never mentioned a thing about him telling a random girl on the street that shes hot, I don't find this to be a compelling argument towards not telling a girl that you like that she looks good under any circumstances. Also, my idea of the context for this is after he and the girl are comfortable. Not on a first or second date.
This is the excuse guys use when women complain about cat-calling.
Right, but since I never mentioned a thing about him telling a random girl on the street that shes hot, I don't find this to be a compelling argument towards not telling a girl that you like that she looks good under any circumstances. Also, my idea of the context for this is after he and the girl are comfortable. Not on a first or second date.
Right, but since I never mentioned a thing about him telling a random girl on the street that shes hot, I don't find this to be a compelling argument towards not telling a girl that you like that she looks good under any circumstances. Also, my idea of the context for this is after he and the girl are comfortable. Not on a first or second date.
Whoa this shit blew up fast. When I say perfect 10 for my tastes, I meant what I'm looking for in a woman: looks, personality, vibes, etc. I didn't mean to offend anyone.
But I haven't been this taken aback by my attraction to someone in at least a year, hence the 10, Kpowers.
That horrible feeling of going to a bar alone and the girl you're interested in leaving before you get the nerve to talk to her never gets any easier. I'm so tired of being single.
That horrible feeling of going to a bar alone and the girl you're interested in leaving before you get the nerve to talk to her never gets any easier. I'm so tired of being single.
That horrible feeling of going to a bar alone and the girl you're interested in leaving before you get the nerve to talk to her never gets any easier. I'm so tired of being single.
My feminist alarm bells are going nuts right now. Can't you just say a girl is really fucking cool and you also like looking at her? I don't understand the need to apply a grading scale to someone's looks.
I'm happy for you jakicker , I just hope she never hears about her grade lol, even if it's an A++
I'm sure she would be absolutely disgusted to know how beautiful he finds her to be physically.
I noticed about 5 different things in his story about this girl that we a little "ew-ish"
That horrible feeling of going to a bar alone and the girl you're interested in leaving before you get the nerve to talk to her never gets any easier. I'm so tired of being single.
What happened to your 10
We weren't compatible. I think I got a little ahead of myself with her.
I realized what's worse than not getting up the nerve to talk to a girl. Everyone has a boyfriend. Even if they don't tell you that they do, they do. At least all the girls I talk to. I've slowly found out these past weeks, one by one, that almost every girl I've casually dated were in relationships. I've been the man on the side so many times it's disgusting. It sucks enough to know you've been lied to, but even worse to realize that you unknowingly contributed to possibly hurting other people.
Or like last night when you meet someone that you click with on so many levels and are super attracted to. You spend the whole night at a party getting to know them and dancing with them. Then you find out she has a boyfriend. And she makes a point to imply that she isn't happy with him. And when you say you wish she were single and you're flattered but you're cant do that to someone else. So she says "well life is crazy you never know what will happen one day" and that "there's nothing wrong with flirting" and invites you to a bar to continue trying to tease you. Just so that at the end of the night she can have her ego fed and she can go home to him. So you politely decline and watch her leave. And she goes about her life, and he is unaware, and you're left feeling something resembling a mix of loneliness, rejection, and frustration.
Contrary to some belief...it is ok to spend innocent time with someone and not go home with them while still enjoying the company of another human.
I assume this was either directed at me or in reference to my last post.
In that situation, it's frustrating when two people have different intentions. I was hoping she was single so that I could hang out with her again. She was just looking for supposedly innocent fun and flirting. I was actually bummed out and wasn't interested in someone who was unavailable. It's frustrating when time and again women who are in relationships engage me as though they're interested in me. I've found out the hard way multiple times now that girls I've been casually dating had boyfriends.
It triggers me for multiple reasons. 1. I'm either being lied to like in the past or in this case having information withheld from me. 2. It reminds me of my ex wife and how she was having emotional relationships behind my back. 3. Some dude is getting lied to by his girlfriend and I'm unknowingly a part of it which makes me feel like shit. 4. I would rather hear a girl say that she just isn't into me than tell me that she is totally into me but can't because of her boyfriend (who she proceeds to talk about as if he is a shitty person).
Long story short, people's intentions need to match up.
Contrary to some belief...it is ok to spend innocent time with someone and not go home with them while still enjoying the company of another human.
Depends on how you define "innocent time." If innocent time means going out while being in a committed relationship and proceeding to be all over a complete stranger in order to resuscitate your damaged ego or promote some sick narcissistic pleasure, meanwhile wasting another human's time that you know is looking for something contrary to your own intentions, then yeah, it's totally fine to go out and have an "innocent time" with another human.
Contrary to some belief...it is ok to spend innocent time with someone and not go home with them while still enjoying the company of another human.
Depends on how you define "innocent time." If innocent time means going out while being in a committed relationship and proceeding to be all over a complete stranger in order to resuscitate your damaged ego or promote some sick narcissistic pleasure, meanwhile wasting another human's time that you know is looking for something contrary to your own intentions, then yeah, it's totally fine to go out and have an "innocent time" with another human.
Where in the above story was the girl "all over" him?
Contrary to some belief...it is ok to spend innocent time with someone and not go home with them while still enjoying the company of another human.
Depends on how you define "innocent time." If innocent time means going out while being in a committed relationship and proceeding to be all over a complete stranger in order to resuscitate your damaged ego or promote some sick narcissistic pleasure, meanwhile wasting another human's time that you know is looking for something contrary to your own intentions, then yeah, it's totally fine to go out and have an "innocent time" with another human.
Thank you for this. It feels good to know I'm not crazy.
Depends on how you define "innocent time." If innocent time means going out while being in a committed relationship and proceeding to be all over a complete stranger in order to resuscitate your damaged ego or promote some sick narcissistic pleasure, meanwhile wasting another human's time that you know is looking for something contrary to your own intentions, then yeah, it's totally fine to go out and have an "innocent time" with another human.
Where in the above story was the girl "all over" him?
I didn't directly say it, but there was a lot of dancing, physical touch flirtation, and flirtation in general. She only reluctantly admitted she was in a relationship after a few hours of one on one interaction.
I probably should've asked her earlier, and it wouldn't have been as big deal had this same scenario not happened to me multiple times before.
