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Post by Dave Maynar on Jul 12, 2013 8:24:44 GMT -5
The Continuing Adventures of Dave and his Admin:
(Dave walks up to his admin's desk and sees the IT woman is there with his admin) Dave: Oh, is she helping you finally learn where the Start button is on your computer? Admin: Son, I know where the button is that turns my computer on. I'm not stupid.
Work *sshole - "Hey, Brendan, sorry man, we f*cked up and put the glass panel on the wall too soon and the compound wasn't dry. It slid off the wall and now we have to do it over, but we won't be done today. We need to come in on Sunday."
(anger building) Me - "Okay."
Work *sshole - "Yeah, and (the client) was here when it happened, so she's pretty pissed. I told her to call you if she wants to talk about it, since I don't handle clients very well."
(anger boiling) Me - "Great. Thanks."
Work *sshole - "Oh, one last thing. I can't cover on Sunday, you're going to have to come in."
Lord. Body substance isolation. You have my full and utter sympathy; that really sucks. I hope you're OK. Are you testing, and if so, when do you get results back?
Back to that earlier story about being trained for an ambulance hobby-type job by cynical street medics: I got blood all over my hands one time from an elderly patient at the dialysis clinic, and when I, a little agitatedly, asked the nurses where I could wash up, one of them was like: "Oh, got bled on, did we? Meh."
As far as spraying blood, I also worked on a guy once whose right femoral artery had been slashed open with a knife. More of a gush than a spray.
Post by crazykittensmile on Jul 12, 2013 13:25:10 GMT -5
We took our boss out to breakfast this morning to celebrate her birthday. My co-worker sitting next to me decided this was the perfect time to randomly express her sympathy for George Zimmerman.
Her "Oh, no matter what happens, his life is ruined... What a horrible situation, etc..." Me "Well, at least he's still alive."
What's up with people who bring up super controversial things like this at work? This isn't the first time with her, either.
Lord. Body substance isolation. You have my full and utter sympathy; that really sucks. I hope you're OK. Are you testing, and if so, when do you get results back?
Back to that earlier story about being trained for an ambulance hobby-type job by cynical street medics: I got blood all over my hands one time from an elderly patient at the dialysis clinic, and when I, a little agitatedly, asked the nurses where I could wash up, one of them was like: "Oh, got bled on, did we? Meh."
As far as spraying blood, I also worked on a guy once whose right femoral artery had been slashed open with a knife. More of a gush than a spray.
Yeah, work is hell.
I got tested for everything when I left work, and she was tested later that evening when she was awake and could consent to it. I should have the results next week
Post by Dave Maynar on Jul 18, 2013 13:53:17 GMT -5
The set-up for this story is that 1) I live in East TN and 2) Due to frequent contact with some consultants and their... we'll say... country backgrounds, we tend to have a more relaxed relationship with them.
Overhead at work yesterday Supervisor: "Didn't you have an appointment scheduled for today." Co-worker: "Yeah, he had to reschedule with me. Apparently, he has to go tubin' today." Supervisor: "What?" Co-worker: "He forgot their company picnic is today. They're going to the river." Supervisor: "Alright then. As long as it got rescheduled."
Post by NothingButFlowers on Jul 18, 2013 14:11:19 GMT -5
When I was younger (up until my second year of college, really), I thought I wanted to be a high school English teacher. As I sit here now, editing a draft of something written by a law clerk, who obviously has not only passed high school English, but has also gone on through college and law school, I realize that I would not have been a good teacher, as I would have been overwhelmed with the desire to write things like, "This is the worst thing I have ever read! What's wrong with you?" on my students' papers, and I'm pretty sure that after a year or two of that, I would have been compelled to give in to those desires.
When I was younger (up until my second year of college, really), I thought I wanted to be a high school English teacher. As I sit here now, editing a draft of something written by a law clerk, who obviously has not only passed high school English, but has also gone on through college and law school, I realize that I would not have been a good teacher, as I would have been overwhelmed with the desire to write things like, "This is the worst thing I have ever read! What's wrong with you?" on my students' papers, and I'm pretty sure that after a year or two of that, I would have been compelled to give in to those desires.
I hear that is why a lot of teachers grade stuff while drinking. Because it makes reading crap like that bearable. Maybe you should try it at work??? lol
When I was younger (up until my second year of college, really), I thought I wanted to be a high school English teacher. As I sit here now, editing a draft of something written by a law clerk, who obviously has not only passed high school English, but has also gone on through college and law school, I realize that I would not have been a good teacher, as I would have been overwhelmed with the desire to write things like, "This is the worst thing I have ever read! What's wrong with you?" on my students' papers, and I'm pretty sure that after a year or two of that, I would have been compelled to give in to those desires.
I just posted the job opening we have at the info desk on the campus job service, which means for about the next 4 weeks I'll be getting something like 20 emails a day with resumes and cover letters. About 90% of the applications make me question this schools admissions policies. I've always been tempted to send them rejection letters catered to their specific stupidities.
EX: Person sends me a cover letter that they obviously had used before and just plugged in my name and the student union, but only managed to do so for half the letter so about halfway through they were writing to someone else about some other job.
I wanted to send a rejection letter where halfway through I start referring to them as some other person applying for some other job
When I was younger (up until my second year of college, really), I thought I wanted to be a high school English teacher. As I sit here now, editing a draft of something written by a law clerk, who obviously has not only passed high school English, but has also gone on through college and law school, I realize that I would not have been a good teacher, as I would have been overwhelmed with the desire to write things like, "This is the worst thing I have ever read! What's wrong with you?" on my students' papers, and I'm pretty sure that after a year or two of that, I would have been compelled to give in to those desires.
I hear that is why a lot of teachers grade stuff while drinking. Because it makes reading crap like that bearable. Maybe you should try it at work??? lol
When I was younger (up until my second year of college, really), I thought I wanted to be a high school English teacher. As I sit here now, editing a draft of something written by a law clerk, who obviously has not only passed high school English, but has also gone on through college and law school, I realize that I would not have been a good teacher, as I would have been overwhelmed with the desire to write things like, "This is the worst thing I have ever read! What's wrong with you?" on my students' papers, and I'm pretty sure that after a year or two of that, I would have been compelled to give in to those desires.
I just posted the job opening we have at the info desk on the campus job service, which means for about the next 4 weeks I'll be getting something like 20 emails a day with resumes and cover letters. About 90% of the applications make me question this schools admissions policies. I've always been tempted to send them rejection letters catered to their specific stupidities.
EX: Person sends me a cover letter that they obviously had used before and just plugged in my name and the student union, but only managed to do so for half the letter so about halfway through they were writing to someone else about some other job.
I wanted to send a rejection letter where halfway through I start referring to them as some other person applying for some other job
Having been the recipient of a few rejection letters in my time, the thought of personalized ones kind of terrifies me. But then, if you can't even be bothered to proofread your own cover letter, you probably deserve something like that. Actually, it could be argued that you would be doing them a favor by pointing out for them what they should not do next time (assuming of course that they read more than halfway through the rejection letter).
When I was younger (up until my second year of college, really), I thought I wanted to be a high school English teacher. As I sit here now, editing a draft of something written by a law clerk, who obviously has not only passed high school English, but has also gone on through college and law school, I realize that I would not have been a good teacher, as I would have been overwhelmed with the desire to write things like, "This is the worst thing I have ever read! What's wrong with you?" on my students' papers, and I'm pretty sure that after a year or two of that, I would have been compelled to give in to those desires.
I just posted the job opening we have at the info desk on the campus job service, which means for about the next 4 weeks I'll be getting something like 20 emails a day with resumes and cover letters. About 90% of the applications make me question this schools admissions policies. I've always been tempted to send them rejection letters catered to their specific stupidities.
EX: Person sends me a cover letter that they obviously had used before and just plugged in my name and the student union, but only managed to do so for half the letter so about halfway through they were writing to someone else about some other job.
I wanted to send a rejection letter where halfway through I start referring to them as some other person applying for some other job
I've dealt with similar issues with applications/resumes/cover letters from students. Because they are students, I think it's almost my responsibility to point out their errors to them so they don't continue on f*cking up into their post-graduate life. I've always received good feedback when I point things out in a helpful way. Like "Hey, I noticed half of this cover letter appeared to be for another position, maybe it was an issue of saving the document incorrectly... in the future I would advise that you proofread your documents before sending them over." etc etc...
I hear that is why a lot of teachers grade stuff while drinking. Because it makes reading crap like that bearable. Maybe you should try it at work??? lol
I just posted the job opening we have at the info desk on the campus job service, which means for about the next 4 weeks I'll be getting something like 20 emails a day with resumes and cover letters. About 90% of the applications make me question this schools admissions policies. I've always been tempted to send them rejection letters catered to their specific stupidities.
EX: Person sends me a cover letter that they obviously had used before and just plugged in my name and the student union, but only managed to do so for half the letter so about halfway through they were writing to someone else about some other job.
I wanted to send a rejection letter where halfway through I start referring to them as some other person applying for some other job
Having been the recipient of a few rejection letters in my time, the thought of personalized ones kind of terrifies me. But then, if you can't even be bothered to proofread your own cover letter, you probably deserve something like that. Actually, it could be argued that you would be doing them a favor by pointing out for them what they should not do next time (assuming of course that they read more than halfway through the rejection letter).
That would be my defense when I would get called into my supervisors office for terrorizing the freshmen.
It's not all just proof reading stuff. My absolute favorite is the girl who wrote in her cover letter she would not be available to work or for interviews until after 12 because she likes to sleep in.
Post by krunchykat on Jul 18, 2013 18:34:47 GMT -5
My boss's mother-in-law, Mary, is starting to suffer from dementia. Today Mary came in to drop off some things and somehow left convinced I had spanked one of our 3 year olds. The crazy bitch even claimed I said "Yes, I spanked him." Talk about a mess for a few minutes. If my boss had called freaking out on me rather than questioning what she was told I would be unemployed right now cause I would have told her to shove this job up her fucking ass. Thankfully she has known me and worked with me long enough to know it couldn't be true and knows that her MIL's mental state is rapidly declining. I swear I thought I was going to be sick for a moment today.
On the whole resume/cover letter thing: back when I used to do a lot of interviewing and hiring I'd always lift an eyebrow when recent graduates with Anglo surnames put "fluent in Spanish" on their resumes. I can get by in Spanish and so I'd always start the interview in Spanish, and without exception I discovered that every single one of these people was bullsh*tting. The terror on their faces was priceless.
On the whole resume/cover letter thing: back when I used to do a lot of interviewing and hiring I'd always lift an eyebrow when recent graduates with Anglo surnames put "fluent in Spanish" on their resumes. I can get by in Spanish and so I'd always start the interview in Spanish, and without exception I discovered that every single one of these people was bullsh*tting. The terror on their faces was priceless.
Hah! I wish I was good enough to pull that off, alas . About half the resumes I get mention proficiency in Spanish, which i'm guessing means they got a C in Span102 from the local community college where everyone goes because the class is too hard here.
On the whole resume/cover letter thing: back when I used to do a lot of interviewing and hiring I'd always lift an eyebrow when recent graduates with Anglo surnames put "fluent in Spanish" on their resumes. I can get by in Spanish and so I'd always start the interview in Spanish, and without exception I discovered that every single one of these people was bullsh*tting. The terror on their faces was priceless.
Hah! I wish I was good enough to pull that off, alas . About half the resumes I get mention proficiency in Spanish, which i'm guessing means they got a C in Span102 from the local community college where everyone goes because the class is too hard here.
Hand them a Spanish newspaper article and say: "We could really use somebody who speaks Spanish. Can you translate this for me?"
Hah! I wish I was good enough to pull that off, alas . About half the resumes I get mention proficiency in Spanish, which i'm guessing means they got a C in Span102 from the local community college where everyone goes because the class is too hard here.
Hand them a Spanish newspaper article and say: "We could really use somebody who speaks Spanish. Can you translate this for me?"
That's actually a really fantastic idea. We really do need more Spainish speaking students here. Unfortunately, I haven't had a single opportunity to use my German yet
Hand them a Spanish newspaper article and say: "We could really use somebody who speaks Spanish. Can you translate this for me?"
That's actually a really fantastic idea. We really do need more Spainish speaking students here. Unfortunately, I haven't had a single opportunity to use my German yet
The obvious question becomes: "What ELSE are you bullsh*tting me about on here?"
Last Edit: Jul 19, 2013 11:22:50 GMT -5 by Deleted - Back to Top
I was taught in high/middle school to use two spaces after periods (graduated 07'), and didn't find out till last year one was "preferred" over two (though it seems the people who use one are the only ones to ever point it out). I use one now but honestly have trouble noticing a difference.
Btw, it's interesting to look up the story about why we originally used two instead of one (had to do with typewritees), if your bored.
I was taught in high/middle school to use two spaces after periods (graduated 07'), and didn't find out till last year one was "preferred" over two (though it seems the people who use one are the only ones to ever point it out). I use one now but honestly have trouble noticing a difference.
Btw, it's interesting to look up the story about why we originally used two instead of one (had to do with typewritees), if your bored.
Same here. I even had a couple professors who only wanted two spaces used after periods because it made papers easier to read.
Post by NothingButFlowers on Jul 19, 2013 12:44:07 GMT -5
When did it become preferred to only use one space after periods? I don't like it. Is this a sign that I'm old? I'm concerned that it is because bogart just indicated that he graduated in '07 as though that was a long time ago, and I graduated ten years before that (incidentally, the girl at the bank told me the other day that I don't look a day over 25; that doesn't have anything to do with this; I just wanted to mention it). Luckily, we use two spaces at the end of our sentences here, so I have not been forced to get used to something new and offensive to my eyes.
I have heard of two spaces after a period on a typewriter, but never on a computer, except for old foagies who don't know the difference between a typewriter and a computer.
I thought two spaces was the standard. But then I was unsure so I started typing some nonsense in a word document to test it out and I only hit one space. But I'm confused because I thought for sure I did two. I don't think I notice a difference though when I look at it. Interesting.
