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Haven't been in a proper relationship since the end of 2010. Every other relationship I've been in since then has been entirely predicated on sex. Maybe it's my personality, maybe it's my irreverence, but there is something about so many people that I just can't seem to wrap my head around. I'm really good at allowing girls to fall in love with me, but I can never seem to fully reciprocate. Plus I think a lot of my intrigue lays in being sort of mysteriously confident and charming, which is convenient and all hunky-dory, until, for whatever reason when girls really get to know me, I'm apparently a little too indifferent for most of the girls I've been with. Basically my romantic life is drowning in honeymoon phases that are just ending. But I'm not gonna stop trying just because it's gonna maybe be shitty.
It's sort of like that Mitch Hedberg joke: I like to drink red wine, this girl says “Doesn’t red wine give you a headache?” “Yeah, eventually. But the first and the middle part are amazing!” I’m not gonna stop doing something because of what happens at the end. “Mitch, do you want an apple?” “No, eventually it’ll be a core.”
Haven't been in a proper relationship since the end of 2010. Every other relationship I've been in since then has been entirely predicated on sex. Maybe it's my personality, maybe it's my irreverence, but there is something about so many people that I just can't seem to wrap my head around. I'm really good at allowing girls to fall in love with me, but I can never seem to fully reciprocate. Plus I think a lot of my intrigue lays in being sort of mysteriously confident and charming, which is convenient and all hunky-dory, until, for whatever reason when girls really get to know me, I'm apparently a little too indifferent for most of the girls I've been with. Basically my romantic life is drowning in honeymoon phases that are just ending. But I'm not gonna stop trying just because it's gonna maybe be shitty.
It's sort of like that Mitch Hedberg joke: I like to drink red wine, this girl says “Doesn’t red wine give you a headache?” “Yeah, eventually. But the first and the middle part are amazing!” I’m not gonna stop doing something because of what happens at the end. “Mitch, do you want an apple?” “No, eventually it’ll be a core.”
I have the opposite problem. I fall deeply in love with people before sex even comes into play. I get overly invested and commit to people completely, because I'm a pretty open guy and generally not too afraid to get my heart broken. So I share too much of myself and pour my heart out, only to have them walk away. And it really sucks because they usually add insult to injury by saying some snarky comment like "Just finish bagging my items and let me leave". Relationships are tough, man.
Sounds like this was just a bad relationship fit altogether. She's probably settled down with some guy who would cringe at the thought of sleeping in a tent shantytown for 4 days.
I'm really terrible at being a real girl. Stick me in a tent. Let me roll around on the ground and talk about inappropriate things.
Sounds like this was just a bad relationship fit altogether. She's probably settled down with some guy who would cringe at the thought of sleeping in a tent shantytown for 4 days.
I'm really terrible at being a real girl. Stick me in a tent. Let me roll around on the ground and talk about inappropriate things.
Haven't been in a proper relationship since the end of 2010. Every other relationship I've been in since then has been entirely predicated on sex. Maybe it's my personality, maybe it's my irreverence, but there is something about so many people that I just can't seem to wrap my head around. I'm really good at allowing girls to fall in love with me, but I can never seem to fully reciprocate. Plus I think a lot of my intrigue lays in being sort of mysteriously confident and charming, which is convenient and all hunky-dory, until, for whatever reason when girls really get to know me, I'm apparently a little too indifferent for most of the girls I've been with. Basically my romantic life is drowning in honeymoon phases that are just ending. But I'm not gonna stop trying just because it's gonna maybe be shitty.
It's sort of like that Mitch Hedberg joke: I like to drink red wine, this girl says “Doesn’t red wine give you a headache?” “Yeah, eventually. But the first and the middle part are amazing!” I’m not gonna stop doing something because of what happens at the end. “Mitch, do you want an apple?” “No, eventually it’ll be a core.”
I resonate a lot with this minus the part about being mysteriously charming. It's really hard to be anything but indifferent after getting your heart absolutely destroyed by someone. I'm assuming that's what happened to you in your last relationship. (Thats definitely what happened to me and why I became indifferent.)
Either way, if there is anything I've learned, it's that love is not something that "just happens." You really need to go out of your way and make a conscious effort to care about someone. That honeymoon phase can only last so long. Everything after that is hard work.
Maybe you're just really unlucky and only meeting lame girls. But my guess is that you haven't yet made a personal commitment to yourself that you want a relationship that works. Only then will you be able to get over your indifference towards your significant others.
On the other hand, maybe a real serious relationship isn't what you want. In which case you shouldn't feel bad about yourself. But maybe you should give those girls a heads up so you don't end up breaking their hearts...and consequently perpetuating the indifference towards love.
Haven't been in a proper relationship since the end of 2010. Every other relationship I've been in since then has been entirely predicated on sex. Maybe it's my personality, maybe it's my irreverence, but there is something about so many people that I just can't seem to wrap my head around. I'm really good at allowing girls to fall in love with me, but I can never seem to fully reciprocate. Plus I think a lot of my intrigue lays in being sort of mysteriously confident and charming, which is convenient and all hunky-dory, until, for whatever reason when girls really get to know me, I'm apparently a little too indifferent for most of the girls I've been with. Basically my romantic life is drowning in honeymoon phases that are just ending. But I'm not gonna stop trying just because it's gonna maybe be shitty.
It's sort of like that Mitch Hedberg joke: I like to drink red wine, this girl says “Doesn’t red wine give you a headache?” “Yeah, eventually. But the first and the middle part are amazing!” I’m not gonna stop doing something because of what happens at the end. “Mitch, do you want an apple?” “No, eventually it’ll be a core.”
I have the opposite problem. I fall deeply in love with people before sex even comes into play. I get overly invested and commit to people completely, because I'm a pretty open guy and generally not too afraid to get my heart broken. So I share too much of myself and pour my heart out, only to have them walk away. And it really sucks because they usually add insult to injury by saying some snarky comment like "Just finish bagging my items and let me leave". Relationships are tough, man.
Haven't been in a proper relationship since the end of 2010. Every other relationship I've been in since then has been entirely predicated on sex. Maybe it's my personality, maybe it's my irreverence, but there is something about so many people that I just can't seem to wrap my head around. I'm really good at allowing girls to fall in love with me, but I can never seem to fully reciprocate. Plus I think a lot of my intrigue lays in being sort of mysteriously confident and charming, which is convenient and all hunky-dory, until, for whatever reason when girls really get to know me, I'm apparently a little too indifferent for most of the girls I've been with. Basically my romantic life is drowning in honeymoon phases that are just ending. But I'm not gonna stop trying just because it's gonna maybe be shitty.
It's sort of like that Mitch Hedberg joke: I like to drink red wine, this girl says “Doesn’t red wine give you a headache?” “Yeah, eventually. But the first and the middle part are amazing!” I’m not gonna stop doing something because of what happens at the end. “Mitch, do you want an apple?” “No, eventually it’ll be a core.”
I resonate a lot with this minus the part about being mysteriously charming. It's really hard to be anything but indifferent after getting your heart absolutely destroyed by someone. I'm assuming that's what happened to you in your last relationship. (That definitely what happened to me and how I became indifferent, and to some extent, still am.)
Either way, if there is anything I've learned, it's that love is not some that "just happens." You really need to go out of your way and make a conscious effort to care about someone. That honeymoon phase can only last so long. Everything after that is hard work.
Maybe you're just really unlucky and only meeting lame girls. But my guess is that you haven't yet made a personal commitment to yourself that you want a relationship that works. Only then will you be able to get over your indifference towards your significant others.
On the other hand, maybe a real serious relationship isn't what you want. In which case you shouldn't feel bad about yourself. But maybe you should give those girls a heads up so you don't end up breaking their hearts...and consequently perpetuating the indifference towards love.
that. seriously. I have had far too many experiences with dudes not being open with what they want, only to finally say something once all those feels have developed. it's the fucking worst. and it makes you feel like shit.
Anywho,'they clearly are not her bag of chips, like most of the shows I wanna see.
Yeah, me and my girl kinda have that problem. I'm a lot more into music than she is in general...but our tastes don't exactly mesh together. We both enjoy Eric Church (she's bigger fan than myself), Trampled by Turtles (I'm a bigger fan than she), and The Black Keys (fairly even on them). She's listen to a lot of country, and a little rock...I'm vice versa.
ps. I would have told her to go fuck herself and take an uber if she wanted to leave early.
This.
My first Roo, my gf decided at 10PM Thursday night that Roo wasn't for her. I told her to sleep on it, she agreed. The next morning she demanded we leave. Quack that- I bought both tickets, I took time off work, I spent hundreds on a great vacation which I spent over a year looking forward to... I had her call a cab. She bussed it from Manchester to Chattanooga, then flew out of my life forever. Sometimes I feel like a d!ck about it, but overall I regret nothing. We weren't a match, and weren't meant to be.
That's a good story. I missed a year anniversary for Bonnaroo once, even though she got over it I still get shit for it here and there.
My ex and I had a breakup fight (a year before we ended up actually breaking up). He ended up dragged me out to the NFL music experience that weekend to try and make things not shitty anymore, since two of my favorite local artists were playing and it was free and blah blah blah. I was so miserable the whole time. We would run into friends and I would basically go and stand with them. The thought of being anywhere near him made me want to punch his face. It was so obvious to everyone that I didn't want to be there. Luckily, our fight didn't ruin my love for those artists.
my ex and I's break up fight consisted of me showing up to the bar, after inviting him out and him declining, and running into him. he flipped me off, yelled "fuck you, you stupid fucking cunt" across the bar, and walked away - for no reason. (the bar he worked at, mind you. and where everyone we knew hung out)
he was really awesome.
wowowowow that is shitty. im so sorry.
I've only been really, truly in love with someone once. It is the person I'm involved with now (maybe not? We have barely talked in two days, but he's also going through shit right now, so I'm honestly just taking a big step back and waiting on it), and despite how off/on and hot/cold we can be, I haven't stopped fighting for us, and I don't see it happening this time around either, despite the fact that some of our issues aren't things that will easily be resolved - namely, the geographicaly distance we currently have between us. That whole "I'm gonna fight for you till I can't anymore" notion can be both romantic as fuck and idiotic, borderline masochistic. I know this, even as I do it.
Considering you've found the need to respond to my threads as if you are threatened by me I offer you some peace my confused counterpart. May you find peace in your restless soul.
Haven't been in a proper relationship since the end of 2010. Every other relationship I've been in since then has been entirely predicated on sex. Maybe it's my personality, maybe it's my irreverence, but there is something about so many people that I just can't seem to wrap my head around. I'm really good at allowing girls to fall in love with me, but I can never seem to fully reciprocate. Plus I think a lot of my intrigue lays in being sort of mysteriously confident and charming, which is convenient and all hunky-dory, until, for whatever reason when girls really get to know me, I'm apparently a little too indifferent for most of the girls I've been with. Basically my romantic life is drowning in honeymoon phases that are just ending. But I'm not gonna stop trying just because it's gonna maybe be shitty.
It's sort of like that Mitch Hedberg joke: I like to drink red wine, this girl says “Doesn’t red wine give you a headache?” “Yeah, eventually. But the first and the middle part are amazing!” I’m not gonna stop doing something because of what happens at the end. “Mitch, do you want an apple?” “No, eventually it’ll be a core.”
I have the opposite problem. I fall deeply in love with people before sex even comes into play. I get overly invested and commit to people completely, because I'm a pretty open guy and generally not too afraid to get my heart broken. So I share too much of myself and pour my heart out, only to have them walk away. And it really sucks because they usually add insult to injury by saying some snarky comment like "Just finish bagging my items and let me leave". Relationships are tough, man.
Idk if you were joking about this whole thing or if you tried to dilute the seriousness of your post with a joke, but I'm pretty much like this- for realsies.
Actually, I'm like a combo of yours and Nico's posts. I develope feelings super easily, but I don't want anything serious. I allow myself to open up to someone fairly quickly, but then do everything I can to avoid getting hurt. When I start to feel the feels I will actually stop talking to the person all together. Or as long as I can, which usually is like 2 days. I don't Ike sharing my feelings about them to them, so I passively aggressively steer the conversation in every other direction. There is nothing worse than knowing you like someone and being afraid to say it because you either know their answer already, or are afraid of what that answer may be. In either direction. I'm pretty sure if someone told me they had feels for me right now I honestly don't know what id do with that information, even if I had feels back. Which then makes me feel terrible because I have no idea what I want, yet I continue to sit here and just let shit happen which just further confuses myself.
I have the opposite problem. I fall deeply in love with people before sex even comes into play. I get overly invested and commit to people completely, because I'm a pretty open guy and generally not too afraid to get my heart broken. So I share too much of myself and pour my heart out, only to have them walk away. And it really sucks because they usually add insult to injury by saying some snarky comment like "Just finish bagging my items and let me leave". Relationships are tough, man.
Idk if you were joking about this whole thing or if you tried to dilute the seriousness of your post with a joke, but I'm pretty much like this- for realsies.
Actually, I'm like a combo of yours and Nico's posts. I develope feelings super easily, but I don't want anything serious. I allow myself to open up to someone fairly quickly, but then do everything I can to avoid getting hurt. When I start to feel the feels I will actually stop talking to the person all together. Or as long as I can, which usually is like 2 days. I don't Ike sharing my feelings about them to them, so I passively aggressively steer the conversation in every other direction. There is nothing worse than knowing you like someone and being afraid to say it because you either know their answer already, or are afraid of what that answer may be. In either direction. I'm pretty sure if someone told me they had feels for me right now I honestly don't know what id do with that information, even if I had feels back. Which then makes me feel terrible because I have no idea what I want, yet I continue to sit here and just let shit happen which just further confuses myself.
Holy tangent, batman!
I was completely joking. I am quick to open up in the sense that I have no problem sharing my past or how I feel towards someone, but it takes me a while to trust someone and be emotionally vulnerable.
Idk if you were joking about this whole thing or if you tried to dilute the seriousness of your post with a joke, but I'm pretty much like this- for realsies.
Actually, I'm like a combo of yours and Nico's posts. I develope feelings super easily, but I don't want anything serious. I allow myself to open up to someone fairly quickly, but then do everything I can to avoid getting hurt. When I start to feel the feels I will actually stop talking to the person all together. Or as long as I can, which usually is like 2 days. I don't Ike sharing my feelings about them to them, so I passively aggressively steer the conversation in every other direction. There is nothing worse than knowing you like someone and being afraid to say it because you either know their answer already, or are afraid of what that answer may be. In either direction. I'm pretty sure if someone told me they had feels for me right now I honestly don't know what id do with that information, even if I had feels back. Which then makes me feel terrible because I have no idea what I want, yet I continue to sit here and just let shit happen which just further confuses myself.
Holy tangent, batman!
I was completely joking. I am quick to open up in the sense that I have no problem sharing my past or how I feel towards someone, but it takes me a while to trust someone and be emotionally vulnerable.
Eh, I stand by everything I said. I had a feeling you were joking, but I ended up typing a lot of pent up shit out anyways, so it's all good.
Haven't been in a proper relationship since the end of 2010. Every other relationship I've been in since then has been entirely predicated on sex. Maybe it's my personality, maybe it's my irreverence, but there is something about so many people that I just can't seem to wrap my head around. I'm really good at allowing girls to fall in love with me, but I can never seem to fully reciprocate. Plus I think a lot of my intrigue lays in being sort of mysteriously confident and charming, which is convenient and all hunky-dory, until, for whatever reason when girls really get to know me, I'm apparently a little too indifferent for most of the girls I've been with. Basically my romantic life is drowning in honeymoon phases that are just ending. But I'm not gonna stop trying just because it's gonna maybe be shitty.
It's sort of like that Mitch Hedberg joke: I like to drink red wine, this girl says “Doesn’t red wine give you a headache?” “Yeah, eventually. But the first and the middle part are amazing!” I’m not gonna stop doing something because of what happens at the end. “Mitch, do you want an apple?” “No, eventually it’ll be a core.”
To relate with you to some extent, Abra once told me that we had been together about 4-5 years before she felt like she really knew anything about me. I have my things that I keep hidden now, but I am in general much more open about such things.
Threads like these make me realize I'm a 20 year old kid and not a 20 year old adult
One of the things you become more and more sure of as you get older is that nobody ever really becomes that image of an adult you had when you were younger.
Threads like these make me realize I'm a 20 year old kid and not a 20 year old adult
One of the things you become more and more sure of as you get older is that nobody ever really becomes that image of an adult you had when you were younger.
Absolutely. Even the people who look like they have their shit together are completely winging it.
Threads like these make me realize I'm a 20 year old kid and not a 20 year old adult
One of the things you become more and more sure of as you get older is that nobody ever really becomes that image of an adult you had when you were younger.
One of the things you become more and more sure of as you get older is that nobody ever really becomes that image of an adult you had when you were younger.
#davesoldmanadvice
^let's get that trending!!!!
As for the topic of this thread, I find it best to not give a shit.
Threads like these make me realize I'm a 20 year old kid and not a 20 year old adult
One of the things you become more and more sure of as you get older is that nobody ever really becomes that image of an adult you had when you were younger.
I have the opposite problem. I fall deeply in love with people before sex even comes into play. I get overly invested and commit to people completely, because I'm a pretty open guy and generally not too afraid to get my heart broken. So I share too much of myself and pour my heart out, only to have them walk away. And it really sucks because they usually add insult to injury by saying some snarky comment like "Just finish bagging my items and let me leave". Relationships are tough, man.
Idk if you were joking about this whole thing or if you tried to dilute the seriousness of your post with a joke, but I'm pretty much like this- for realsies.
Actually, I'm like a combo of yours and Nico's posts. I develope feelings super easily, but I don't want anything serious. I allow myself to open up to someone fairly quickly, but then do everything I can to avoid getting hurt. When I start to feel the feels I will actually stop talking to the person all together. Or as long as I can, which usually is like 2 days. I don't Ike sharing my feelings about them to them, so I passively aggressively steer the conversation in every other direction. There is nothing worse than knowing you like someone and being afraid to say it because you either know their answer already, or are afraid of what that answer may be. In either direction. I'm pretty sure if someone told me they had feels for me right now I honestly don't know what id do with that information, even if I had feels back. Which then makes me feel terrible because I have no idea what I want, yet I continue to sit here and just let shit happen which just further confuses myself.
Holy tangent, batman!
I liked reading your tangent - for real. I'm similar in that when I feel things, I feel them strongly and have trouble ignoring those emotions, but I don't give myself (spiritually, emotionally, etc.) to people easily at all.
Considering you've found the need to respond to my threads as if you are threatened by me I offer you some peace my confused counterpart. May you find peace in your restless soul.
Idk if you were joking about this whole thing or if you tried to dilute the seriousness of your post with a joke, but I'm pretty much like this- for realsies.
Actually, I'm like a combo of yours and Nico's posts. I develope feelings super easily, but I don't want anything serious. I allow myself to open up to someone fairly quickly, but then do everything I can to avoid getting hurt. When I start to feel the feels I will actually stop talking to the person all together. Or as long as I can, which usually is like 2 days. I don't Ike sharing my feelings about them to them, so I passively aggressively steer the conversation in every other direction. There is nothing worse than knowing you like someone and being afraid to say it because you either know their answer already, or are afraid of what that answer may be. In either direction. I'm pretty sure if someone told me they had feels for me right now I honestly don't know what id do with that information, even if I had feels back. Which then makes me feel terrible because I have no idea what I want, yet I continue to sit here and just let shit happen which just further confuses myself.
Holy tangent, batman!
I liked reading your tangent - for real. I'm similar in that when I feel things, I feel them strongly and have trouble ignoring those emotions, but I don't give myself (spiritually, emotionally, etc.) to people easily at all.
It's extremely difficult. And the fact that I'm not really willing to work on it is sorta concerning.
We all gp through times when we feel unwilling, or even unable, to work on it. For instance, I know that if things don't go well with my relationship struggles right now (aka we end things for good), I'm probably not going to be open and ready to care about someone again for a fucking long time. I can already predict that - I will feel pretty dead inside. And it won't last that way forever, but bouncing back from an emotionally intense and perhaps sometimes debilitating romantic relationship is not an easy task, even for the brave hearted.
Considering you've found the need to respond to my threads as if you are threatened by me I offer you some peace my confused counterpart. May you find peace in your restless soul.
Considering you've found the need to respond to my threads as if you are threatened by me I offer you some peace my confused counterpart. May you find peace in your restless soul.
Well, we were supposed to go out again to celebrate the life of one of my best friends (RIP) at the bar we all used to hang at. At least some friends told me I can totally crash with them. I've kinda reached the point of just throwin' my hands in the air.
