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Pop-Pop: "I'll have a Sam Adams." Waitress: "Would you like the 12oz or 16oz?" Pop-Pop: "Yes."
As a part-time server, I can tell you that sort of thing happens all the time. People just don't listen close enough to realize that a choice is being given. 16 or 20 oz? Ok. Fries or a salad? Sure. Unless your pop-pop was intentionally trying to be funny. Then carry on.
Had an appointment with a new oncologist up at UNC Wednesday. Conversation with my Mom on Thursday Mom: Called you on the cell because I'm not sure how long you're going to be at your appointment today. Me: That was yesterday Mom. Mom: Are you sure? I was sure it was today.
my cute little blonde friend and I talking about a fellow nursing student: ME-she has a 10 1/2 month old and a 1 month old. she is a brave soul. BLONDE: that must be so stressful. ME: she's got "Irish twins". BLONDE: she's Asian, how would she have Irish twins?
the other girl with us and I just busted out laughing.
Gramps- "Do you know why women like cherry tomatoes?
Uncle- "No."
Gramps- "They like to put it in between their teeth and gently bite down."
Uncle- "Why?"
Gramps- "They like to feel it squirt down their throat."
This is just one of the many jokes I heard from them today.
What a terrible, awesome thing for a Grandpa to say. Aren't family terribly awesome?
The two of them are always talking like this. My entire family is full of dirty minds. There were plenty of other comments made, but they are quite crazy. At one point the two of them decided to start calling my cousin cake fucker.
Mom: so I saw something on facebook that squirting is actually peeing. I had never even heard of squirting. I asked your brother about it and he just stared at me and walked away. Me: Mom! first who hasn't heard of squirting and second, why do you feel the need to ask your children about these things? Mom: so girls just go around peeing on their partners? me: ohmygod mom enough.
Today my four-year-old cousin was running around giving everybody fake names - my mom was Uncle Chet, his Uncle Chet was Aunt Joe Gail, his aunt was "George", etc. My mom is playing around with him, getting him to give names to everyone in our family, when she gets to me. After asking him what my name is, he pauses for a second, looks at me, and says "Little Boobie". We have no clue where he got this from.
Today my four-year-old cousin was running around giving everybody fake names - my mom was Uncle Chet, his Uncle Chet was Aunt Joe Gail, his aunt was "George", etc. My mom is playing around with him, getting him to give names to everyone in our family, when she gets to me. After asking him what my name is, he pauses for a second, looks at me, and says "Little Boobie". We have no clue where he got this from.
But I do know one thing: I am Little Boobie.
I think this warrants you changing your username from Jazmo to Little Boobie.
This reminds me of the time my mom was convinced I was on drugs because I was chewing gum.
"Why are your eyes dilated?!" "Because it's nighttime, and we're outside." "And why are you chewing gum?! You never chew gum." "Because I just finished a cigarette and now my breath stinks." "I'm onto you, boy."
Fun times.
Last Edit: May 4, 2015 22:57:26 GMT -5 by Jaz - Back to Top
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the wife and I were talking about a kid who was left in a car for an extended period and ended up having to go to the hospital, in the presence of our daughter who we thought wasn't paying attention/didn't understand.
well after we got home from the grocery yesterday, the 3 year old, who insists on being independent and climbing out of the car seat/car herself saw us walking away/into the house:
the wife and I were talking about a kid who was left in a car for an extended period and ended up having to go to the hospital, in the presence of our daughter who we thought wasn't paying attention/didn't understand.
well after we got home from the grocery yesterday, the 3 year old, who insists on being independent and climbing out of the car seat/car herself saw us walking away/into the house:
"wait for me I don't wanna be dead!"
Always assume your kids are hearing and understand you. You'll find you will constantly underestimate them otherwise and get in trouble.
Also from Easter,
(after being told the ladyfriend's name on multiple occassions including that day) Dad (to ladyfriend): Thanks for coming out for Easter. It was great to meet you. What was your name again?
From yesterday, My younger son finally lost his first tooth at age 7 on Sunday. I come home yesterday and ask him how his day was. He pulls his lip down and says, "I look like a hillbilly!"
