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Always assume your kids are hearing and understand you. You'll find you will constantly underestimate them otherwise and get in trouble.
Also from Easter,
(after being told the ladyfriend's name on multiple occassions including that day) Dad (to ladyfriend): Thanks for coming out for Easter. It was great to meet you. What was your name again?
From yesterday, My younger son finally lost his first tooth at age 7 on Sunday. I come home yesterday and ask him how his day was. He pulls his lip down and says, "I look like a hillbilly!"
I just have bad luck when it comes to significant others and my dad's side of the family.
My current SO is pretty much perfect for me, is understanding, communicates well, and encourages me to be myself: "Nice to meet you." And they always say her name incorrectly even though I've told it to them a thousand times (not to mention we have been together for two years).
My ex who cheated on me multiple times and tried to mold my personality to fit into her idea of what I should be like: "We LOVE her!!! How is she doing?!?!" I STILL get questions about her from them to this day, and I haven't spoken to her in years. This is the same person who caused me to spiral into a phase of depression and self loathing.
I have issues with my dad's side of the family.
Last Edit: May 5, 2015 14:09:08 GMT -5 by ゴジラ - Back to Top
Always assume your kids are hearing and understand you. You'll find you will constantly underestimate them otherwise and get in trouble.
Also from Easter,
(after being told the ladyfriend's name on multiple occassions including that day) Dad (to ladyfriend): Thanks for coming out for Easter. It was great to meet you. What was your name again?
From yesterday, My younger son finally lost his first tooth at age 7 on Sunday. I come home yesterday and ask him how his day was. He pulls his lip down and says, "I look like a hillbilly!"
I just have bad luck when it comes to significant others and my dad's side of the family.
My current SO is pretty much perfect for me, is understanding, communicates well, and encourages me to be myself: "Nice to meet you." And they always say her name incorrectly even though I've told it to them a thousand times.
My ex who cheated on me multiple times and tried to mold my personality to fit into her idea of what I should be like: "We LOVE her!!! How is she doing?!?!" I STILL get questions about her from them to this day, and I haven't spoken to her in years. This is the same person who caused me to spiral into a phase of depression and self loathing.
I have issues with my dad's side of the family.
My dad is a special guy. He is not what you would call socially skilled.
I just have bad luck when it comes to significant others and my dad's side of the family.
My current SO is pretty much perfect for me, is understanding, communicates well, and encourages me to be myself: "Nice to meet you." And they always say her name incorrectly even though I've told it to them a thousand times.
My ex who cheated on me multiple times and tried to mold my personality to fit into her idea of what I should be like: "We LOVE her!!! How is she doing?!?!" I STILL get questions about her from them to this day, and I haven't spoken to her in years. This is the same person who caused me to spiral into a phase of depression and self loathing.
I have issues with my dad's side of the family.
My dad is a special guy. He is not what you would call socially skilled.
Yep. I'm in the exact same boat. Dude probably asks about her because he has no idea what is going on in my life or relationships. He's too afraid to talk openly about emotions or anything like that. He's never talked about it. Conversation with my dad and stepmother is just a bunch of mundane, fake Stepford Wives-esque bullshit with a little Southern hospitality thrown in the mix.
Always assume your kids are hearing and understand you. You'll find you will constantly underestimate them otherwise and get in trouble.
Also from Easter,
(after being told the ladyfriend's name on multiple occassions including that day) Dad (to ladyfriend): Thanks for coming out for Easter. It was great to meet you. What was your name again?
From yesterday, My younger son finally lost his first tooth at age 7 on Sunday. I come home yesterday and ask him how his day was. He pulls his lip down and says, "I look like a hillbilly!"
I just have bad luck when it comes to significant others and my dad's side of the family.
My current SO is pretty much perfect for me, is understanding, communicates well, and encourages me to be myself: "Nice to meet you." And they always say her name incorrectly even though I've told it to them a thousand times (not to mention we have been together for two years).
My ex who cheated on me multiple times and tried to mold my personality to fit into her idea of what I should be like: "We LOVE her!!! How is she doing?!?!" I STILL get questions about her from them to this day, and I haven't spoken to her in years. This is the same person who caused me to spiral into a phase of depression and self loathing.
I have issues with my dad's side of the family.
Uggh, that convo sounds entirely too familiar. And they mean well, mostly - but then with me and both my brothers, they make absolutely no effort to avoid things like this (often to the point of direct comparisons). They can never just let it be... which is ironic, since they often complain about the same thing from my grandparents. It took me moving to the other side of the planet for them to finally quit dropping not-so-subtle hints about getting back together with my college girlfriend. And it looks like you've already tried that one, Gojira-san.
I just have bad luck when it comes to significant others and my dad's side of the family.
My current SO is pretty much perfect for me, is understanding, communicates well, and encourages me to be myself: "Nice to meet you." And they always say her name incorrectly even though I've told it to them a thousand times (not to mention we have been together for two years).
My ex who cheated on me multiple times and tried to mold my personality to fit into her idea of what I should be like: "We LOVE her!!! How is she doing?!?!" I STILL get questions about her from them to this day, and I haven't spoken to her in years. This is the same person who caused me to spiral into a phase of depression and self loathing.
I have issues with my dad's side of the family.
Uggh, that convo sounds entirely too familiar. And they mean well, mostly - but then with me and both my brothers, they make absolutely no effort to avoid things like this (often to the point of direct comparisons). They can never just let it be... which is ironic, since they often complain about the same thing from my grandparents. It took me moving to the other side of the planet for them to finally quit dropping not-so-subtle hints about getting back together with my college girlfriend. And it looks like you've already tried that one, Gojira-san.
Man, I think the only thing that will make them stop bringing it up is when I finally do the whole marriage thing. And even then, I'm not sure that it would be any better. It kind of sucks, but I kind of realized a long time ago that you pick your own family - blood really isn't all that important.
Uggh, that convo sounds entirely too familiar. And they mean well, mostly - but then with me and both my brothers, they make absolutely no effort to avoid things like this (often to the point of direct comparisons). They can never just let it be... which is ironic, since they often complain about the same thing from my grandparents. It took me moving to the other side of the planet for them to finally quit dropping not-so-subtle hints about getting back together with my college girlfriend. And it looks like you've already tried that one, Gojira-san.
Man, I think the only thing that will make them stop bringing it up is when I finally do the whole marriage thing. And even then, I'm not sure that it would be any better. It kind of sucks, but I kind of realized a long time ago that you pick your own family - blood really isn't all that important.
It wasn't until my brother had been married a couple years that my mom stopped mentioning his ex from several years earlier. She still holds a candle for my other brother's ex, too.
I'm pretty sure I'm just not going to tell my parents when I get married 'til I'm like five years in.
My dad posted a really long thing on Facebook today about global warming not being real... The older I get the more and more I disagree with his entire worldview. Last time I saw him we got into a debate over politics, religion and gay rights. And this is tough since I'm a total daddy's girl and I only get to see him once every other year or so. But wtf dad!? If he were any other person in this world I would distance myself as much as I could from his crazy Fox News watching, kool aide drinking ass.
But I can't. And I love him. So I'm going to just keep my mouth shut on this kind of stuff. Ugh.
I just came downstairs to find my grandparents in front of the TV, blasting an infomercial for oldies CDs. They were just enjoying the music, they said.
Long story short, my brother in law who is over 30 and still lives with his parents and has never had a girlfriend in the 12 years that I've known him, finally has a gf. He met this girl online, she's from CT. She's here today and she's meeting his family. My wife's mom just told her that the girl is too dark skinned (she's Puerto Rican) and they're scared for 90 something year old, racist as hell granny too even meet her. Like, literally the words "she's too dark" came out of her mouth. Unfuckingbelievable.
Post by NothingButFlowers on Oct 4, 2019 9:12:09 GMT -5
At what point do you start writing people in your family off? My cousins keep posting ridiculous bullshit on Facebook. Twice now, I've made detailed comments addressing one cousin's posts. She ignored both of my comments. I've not been mean or anything, just calmly explained why the thing she posted was wrong. It's almost like I think I might be able to get through to her, but I'm pretty sure that's completely irrational. Maybe I'm really just trying to see what it takes to get her to block me. Today, I just unfriended another cousin's wife because she posted a "Trump in the White House/Hillary in the jailhouse/Bernie in the nuthouse" meme. I don't even really know the woman. She married my cousin well after I stopped being in close contact with that side of my family, and I think I may have met her twice, maybe only once. So I guess it didn't seem worth it to try to say anything.
I know this isn't exactly what this thread was meant for, but it seems like an appropriate turn given that, in the time since this thread was started, it seems like half the world has turned into our ignorant, racist old relatives.
NothingButFlowers, in my opinion it’s never too early to cut family members outta my life. If you support the monster in charge of this country I have no time to bother with you. If you cannot see how awful he and his administration are not just fer our country, but the world overall then you can fuck right off.
At what point do you start writing people in your family off? My cousins keep posting ridiculous bullshit on Facebook. Twice now, I've made detailed comments addressing one cousin's posts. She ignored both of my comments. I've not been mean or anything, just calmly explained why the thing she posted was wrong. It's almost like I think I might be able to get through to her, but I'm pretty sure that's completely irrational. Maybe I'm really just trying to see what it takes to get her to block me. Today, I just unfriended another cousin's wife because she posted a "Trump in the White House/Hillary in the jailhouse/Bernie in the nuthouse" meme. I don't even really know the woman. She married my cousin well after I stopped being in close contact with that side of my family, and I think I may have met her twice, maybe only once. So I guess it didn't seem worth it to try to say anything.
I know this isn't exactly what this thread was meant for, but it seems like an appropriate turn given that, in the time since this thread was started, it seems like half the world has turned into our ignorant, racist old relatives.
Depends on what you mean by "write them off". I'm a proponent of unfollowing without unfriending if it's family or someone I will inevitable be maintaining a social connection with (coworkers, friends of friends I see often, etc). Facebook makes people think that other people want to hear their opinions. If everyone's being honest, I don't actually care about so-and-so's political opinion and so-and-so probably doesn't actually care about mine. And if either of us did (or are the type to post political memes), we're probably each far too firm in our views to have them changed via Facebook comment. My energy and time are precious and are to be invested wisely; for me they're better spent on the connections I actually care about and the minds I can actually change. So I unfollow and they're outta sight, outta mind.
I have family who have some views I may not agree with but I typically think that most people, regardless of political affiliation, are very attached to the groups they identify with and will defend their belonging to that group irrationally. It's a very human mechanism that provides a form of security. I think that is a far greater influence on most people's politics than they at all realize, and is partially why otherwise sane and decent people end up defending things I think they shouldn't. As such, I give people a generous amount of leeway before actively writing them out of my IRL life, though there are things I don't tolerate also. Gotta weigh a potential lifetime of tension and drama with someone I still will see in my life vs. the ease of unfollowing and forgetting they exist until I see them in person.
I've unfriended family members before, and have told other family members to never bother adding me as a FB friend. Usually they'll friend my gf instead. I don't feel bad about it. I don't have time or patience to read ignorance and pro-Trump shit on my FB feed.
Occasionally my brother's wife will pop up and say something ridiculous - usually about guns. I call her out on her shit, it gets deleted within an hour.
Speaking of ridiculousness, I visited my parents last weekend. I mentioned how business at my work has been slowing down lately due to the Trump tariffs and trade war. My father tried to blame it on environmental regulations and the Clintons (NAFTA). My mother had to cut in and shut the conversation down because my gf and I were about to chew him out.
So, my dad who I've really drifted from over the past few years messaged me today to wish me a happy birthday............
is "lol ok." an inappropriate response, bc that's all I got.
lol. ok.
lol, this was a great follow up to the post a earlier on the page from like 5 years ago where my dad was denying climate change.... at least he's tragically consistent.
So, my dad who I've really drifted from over the past few years messaged me today to wish me a happy birthday............
is "lol ok." an inappropriate response, bc that's all I got.
lol. ok.
lol, this was a great follow up to the post a earlier on the page from like 5 years ago where my dad was denying climate change.... at least he's tragically consistent.
Sister: Trump has every right to pick the next supreme court justice. Me: But they would not let Barack. Sister: It's not the same. Me: How is it not the same? Sister: ...................
So I was making mom watch the Turkuaz show and she’s like oh there’s Adrian Belew who used to play with King Crimson.
My family mostly doesn’t suck.
when I first met my cousins husband we were leaving dinner and I happened to be parked next to him, looked into his car and saw a Crimson live sessions cd set and immediately texted her I liked him
her response after: "it's really hard for me to accept that. and it's wrong."
it fucking hurts so much.
I'm sorry your mother is so narrow minded that she can't see the loving son in front of her eyes. I hope for her sake she gets some clarity and realizes nothing has changed.
Tell her Trump inherited a great economy from President Obama who was hamstrung by Republicans in Congress for much of his terms. And then he proceeded to trash big tech, started a trade war with China which has done nothing but cost us money. And finally his mishandling of the Coronavirus crisis has cost us millions of jobs, closed down millions of small businesses and f'd up the economy as bad as it has been in decades. That very mishandling has cost us $6 trillion so far and is likely to cost another 5. They could have fixed shit in 3 or 4 weeks, but instead we're more than 6 months out with no end in sight.
